Crazy Ever After A Calzona story
by CalzonaNecklace
Summary: Taking the Callie Arizona story line further. Revelation of Arizona's PTSD. Realization on both Arizona & Callie's part that they both made mistakes. Some sweet & tender moments of intimacy. More on April & Arizona's friendship and Meredith & Callie's friendship. "The ties that binds us are sometimes impossible to explain. Because some ties are simply... Meant To Be.. "
1. Chapter 1

Note: All the characters and the story itself are in AU. Well I'm trying my best to stick with originality of characters but they can get a bit overboard and may also go beyond their usual streak. Further I always prefer to tell my story in the form of conversation, like you can see the characters, see their emotions but yet what's inside their mind will stay under wraps. 

We start of where we left. April and Matthew's wedding didn't happened. Arizona and Callie are in frazzled state of their relationship. April is still unsure about where she & Jackson go from there, so she's inclined a lot towards Arizona. Also there are some hidden details of their friendship that are about to surface. 

**CRAZY EVER AFTER!**

**At Hospital:**

Callie & Arizona walk in together to work, discussing the details of the impending board meeting about the latest proposal by April Kepner to open a PTSD cure unit in GSMH. April has pitched the idea to Arizona who has further introduced it to the board members. The board is to take a vote today. While everyone is susceptible to the idea of wasting money on something that isn't a life saving cause, Arizona & Cristina are in favour of its requirements.

_Callie - I'm still not convinced, we have visiting trauma counselors for cases of PTSD, why spend millions in creating a separate unit?_

_Arizona - At least give Kepner a chance. She has an agenda. And it's a good one._

_Callie - Look the board is busy, we're doctors. We can't afford time, just cause your bff has a so-called 'agenda'._

_Arizona - Stop snapping!_

_Callie - I'm not snapping. Okay whatever. You're gonna attend the meeting or not?_

_Arizona - I am already in favour of this. April has my vote. I have a surgery, I'll see if i can make it._

_Callie - Good day!_

_Arizona - Good-Day!_

~April makes her way to the NICU looking for Arizona

_Arizona - heyy what happened? Didn't went well?_

_April - Yes & No. God I'm screwed!_

_Arizona - Why? What happened?_

_April - The board has agreed to fund the unit, but only after they study a past case and how my counseling helped them._

_Arizona - well that's a good thing._

_April - No! Cause when i showed some of my past cases, they chose the full study of patient X as ideal candidature to broadcast my counseling process. They want to see the full counseling of Patient X in person._

_Arizona's face went white in an instance & April knew exactly why. She continued - "Look it will be anonymous. The board wouldn't be aware of patient's identity. It'll be recorded and then we can even disfigure patient's face the video. We can even bring in voice modulation. I promise complete anonymity._

_Arizona - No. No. No we can't... It's infidelity…what if...oh please no...Callie...no!_

_April - Look I'm a trauma surgeon. It's what I'm good at. I failed my board once, i don't do ground breaking surgeries, this project is my everything. Please!_

As if Arizona couldn't bring herself to say anything, she walks off looking confused, shocked and scared.

**At The Apartment **

Later at their apartment Arizona finds Callie merged in some old case files of brain mapping. Callie is literally surprised to see Arizona home, cause ever since they kissed last week, Arizona has come really late at night, mostly after she's asleep or rather she was kind of avoiding to get in closer proximity with her. It was kind of confusing for her, cause she believed Arizona craves that kind of intimacy.

_Callie - huh? How come you are early tonight?_

_Arizona - what do you mean?_

_Callie - Nothing...just... I'm not blind to see that you are avoiding me._

_Arizona - I'm not avoiding you. I'm just...kind of busy._

_Callie - Yeah sell that story to someone else...whatever Congrats! Kepner is most probably getting her funding._

_Arizona - yeah about that...can you ask the board to study any of April's other patients for consideration? _

_Callie - Why? _

_One look on Arizona's face and Callie understood from where Arizona's negotiations are coming from._

_Callie - oh i get it. Patient X's PTSD involves infidelity...is that's what making you uncomfortable?...it just didn't have to... I'm sorry if hits close home._

_Callie knew instantly that her words went a little harsh...it was written all over Arizona's face. She stood up & went closer to Arizona. Arizona was looking down, she knew what Callie was saying was true but still hearing it aloud from her kind of daggers her heart. Callie inched a little closer and cupped Arizona's face, she could see the glitter of tear in her eyes and it caused as much pain to her as much it was causing to Arizona._

_Callie - heyyy look...look at me_

_*Arizona looked up*_

_Callie - We're trying...and...Maybe this will help...maybe it'll help me understand things better...understand YOU better...just don't worry okay..._

_Arizona - I'm sorry you are right...just...it's okay...i'm fine..._

_Callie's hands were still on Arizona's face, they were looking into each other's eyes and then suddenly they sensed the touch, the feel that was sending sensations down their bodies. As if to feel that touch more, to calm those burning sensations down, that were making her knees fluid, Callie inched her face a little closer, guiding her eyes back and forth to Arizona's eyes and her lips. She could feel the heat rising to Arizona's face on her own hands; she could see the fire in Arizona's eyes that were telling her that this mere touch was doing the same wonders to her too. Callie lowered her lips to Arizona's, which were already parting, trying to catch a breath. As soon as their lips touched, Arizona gulped and backed off, breaking their touch instantly. She was out of breath and the way Callie was looking at her, weren't exactly helping her. Callie got confused._

_Arizona - I'm sorry...i think...i mean...i have this patient...a little kid...i didn't check his post op...I need to go._

_Callie - yeah i can tell when you are lying..._

_Arizona - No...I need to go...and...We're not there yet...I'm sorry _

_Callie - We will not be there unless we try to Arizona. You can't just walk away every time we try to move forward._

_Arizona - i know...i know that...it's just too early. We need to talk first._

_Callie - And that's gonna happen with you staying at the hospital all the time? What do you think I'm trying to do here? I'm trying to break all these walls around you__ Arizona__...so i can see you..._

_Arizona - You don't wanna go there Callie...there are parts of me behind these walls that aren't that pretty. You won't like them..._

_As Callie opened her mouth to reply, Arizona's pager goes off and she walks out. Callie's sure she's not gonna return tonight._

**Next day****: ****At Hospital **

April has been closer to Arizona for a long while now. Ever since her wedding was called off, Arizona has been completely supportive to her. There were never many people around her besides Jackson that really were close to her, but ever since she & Arizona became friends, they have gotten really close to each other. They have shared problems, laughs, happiness, dilemmas, everything with each other. And now April really wanted to help Arizona with her fragile relationship with Callie in a big way. Not that she was sure that Arizona will allow this kind of interference in her personal life, but still April was determined to take things overboard for once and for all and see if this could help Arizona save her marriage. She has learned that it always takes 'two to tango' and the fact that Callie has no idea about her part in her fallen fragile marriage with Arizona is a big thing to consider for April.

So, instead of showcasing a recorded version of case study of patient X, she has arranged a live broadcast for the board members in the counselling room itself. She reached the counselling room and took a moment to admire her preparation. The room was divided into two rooms with a glass wall. On the left side of the glass wall, a small table was set for her & Patient X. On the right side a long conference table was set for the board members. Two separate chairs were placed on one hand side of the table, closer to the glass wall for family & friends of Patient X. The glass wall was see through from the right side but opaque from left, so that the board members can see the counselling clearly but still the patient won't have any idea of anyone else being there. April was setting the copies of case file of patient X for everyone when Derek walked in.

_Derek - Morning Dr. Kepner seems like this is gonna be a long day._

_April - *smiling* Indeed it is._

_*Derek took a seat and then Meredith, Cristina & Callie walked in and took their seat around the table*_

_Meredith - Where's Jackson & Arizona?_

_*Webber, Jackson & Karev walked in.*_

_Callie - Karev? What are you doing here?_

_Karev - Robbins is sitting this one out, she asked me to step in._

_April's face went pale as Callie pulled on a pissed off expression on her face._

_Cristina (Looking at empty chairs on family's section) - No one from the family? Come on! No friends?_

_Meredith (to Callie) - Why's Arizona not here._

_Callie - Case of infidelity...must be uncomfortable for her...huh?!_

_April - As most of us are here now, and we are about to start, I would like y'all to sign the papers in front of you that abides you with keeping the patient's identity anonymous and details of this counselling should not leave this room. Failing in which will be a breach of protocol and could lead to malpractice suit. Further, you would be able to see my conversation with the patient through this glass and hear it all through the intercom. Once the counselling starts, it will not be stopped until mid session for a one hour break. You can have any kind of opinion here; your voice will not be reaching that room. Under any circumstances I won't stop the counselling mid way. The Patient has done this counseling once; he/she has agreed to do this again on special request by me._

_*Owen & Bailey walked in*_

_April - As chief of surgery, I have requested Dr. Hunt to sit in. (turns to Callie) Dr. Torres I 'm sorry but you can't have a vote in this project, Dr Bailey is gonna step in for you. You are kindly requested to sit on this side of the table._

_Callie was confused, before she could say anything, April open the glass door on the glass wall and went to the other room. The room which was in darkness until now, got illuminated and Callie's face went white. Everyone got shocked. Callie stood up and made her way towards the closer side of the glass to see clearly, something that was already so clear. Arizona was sitting in there. April made herself sit in front of her. It was all so confusing for everyone as gradually it settled that Patient X is Arizona. Callie was in shock. She couldn't believe her eyes. She still couldn't process anything. Why's Arizona in there? PTSD? Arizona? No?_

_Callie - What's?... What's...? What's going in there? Why. Why's she there?_

_Meredith (holding Callie's hand & making her sit down) - Callie...Arizona is Patient X...she had PTSD?...you ? ...how come you didn't knew ?_

_Cristina - How come none of us knew ?_

_Derek - God ! She had PTSD ? It never looked like..._

_Karev - Come on...this is crap...she's still nailing surgeries like a boss_

_Owen - Seems like her PTSD was different. It's not always visible... Maybe it has some triggers..._

_Webber - She had PTSD since the plane crash ?_

_Bailey - They all had PTSD post crash, her's was not addressed..._

_Callie (fumbling & panicking at everyone's thoughts) - NO ! No she doesn't have PTSD. ...And NO. I won't let anyone have a show of her miseries...our miseries...She doesn't even know that we're watching all this...No...I'm calling this off._

_Meredith (Pinning Callie's hand) - Callie...her miseries were already a show...YOU showed it to us...you showed us your side...let her show hers._

_Callie went speechless. What Meredith was saying, took her back to the moments when she told everyone that Arizona cheated on her._

On The Right Side of Glass -

_Arizona - heyy we can keep this casual right...like my previous sessions ?_

_April - course we can. I'll edit out any casual other stuff we talk about. Don't worry. Just be yourself. Vent out your heart again._

_Arizona - This is awkward..._

_April - You can do this. Just keep answering my questions honestly. Straight how you felt, how you feel and what you think about it now. I know your whole story, and the questions will be modulated accordingly. *Arizona nods*_

_April - So, Dr. Arizona Robbins! You lost your best friend last year, then you were in a plane crash...stranded in woods for a week with a painful open femur fracture, then you have to undergo an above knee amputation on your left leg, then you planned a family with your wife but faced miscarriage. That's a boatload of trauma to handle._

On The Left Side of Glass -

_Meredith - wait !? Miscarriage? When did that happened?_

_Cristina - she was pregnant ?_

_Derek - Say something Torres?_

_Callie - *confused & hurt* we wanted another baby but then we lost it. It was all so awful. I don't wanna talk about it..._

_Cristina - I'm sorry ! Talk about it ? Talk about this ?!...Arizona went through a miscarriage and yet you took off with Sofia that night...for what ? A mistake she probably made when she was out of her mind ?_

_Callie - YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW IT WAS AND IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS..._

_Cristina - Oh i know exactly how it would have been...*looks towards Owen*...i know what it is to hold unaccountable pain inside & than lose it all..._

_Meredith - It is our damn business Callie. Cause you were both our friends & when we were left to choose sides...we choose you...cause all we could see was...your pain...the pain that Arizona gave you...we were never able to see what it must have been for her..._

_Callie - *holding back tears* SHE CHEATED ON ME ! How am I the bad guy in all this ?_

_Derek - You are not ! And it seems like...neither was she._

On The Right Side of Glass -

_April - So when exactly do you figured out there might be something wrong ?_

_Arizona - I cheated on Callie. I betrayed her...I betrayed us. I wanted to blame someone for my fall...so i blamed her...It wasn't until I walked into an empty house that I realised what I have done...that I destroyed her... I destroyed us... I destroyed my family. *cracking voice* and it killed me, knowing that it was my hands that set fire to our beautiful world killed me from inside...it still do. It tore me apart, it flay my heart. It caused pain that I couldn't imagine I could handle...but then I hoped that Callie would hold me...she would hold my grounds the way she always had...she would save me from dying everyday. I never imagined that she would leave me. I never imagined that...I thought together we could fix all this...but then she walked away...she left. *tears in eyes* and then it dawned on me that it's not her, it's me. One night without her & Sofia and it all settled on me that there's something terribly wrong in all this...and it's me. I kept crying...I kept choking to the emptiness of our house... I kept thinking how could I do this ? How could I destroy us ? What's wrong with me ? And then I got the answer... that there might be something wrong with me ._

_April - You did try to talk to her about it ? Right ?_

_Arizona - yeah i did but at that point the feeling of deception & betrayal was too strong on her... She just couldn't be my saviour anymore when she was herself drowning..._

_April - And then you found me. _

_Arizona - *smiling* and then I found you. Remember how we got drunk and talked so much at the night of the gala._

_April - Indeed I do. That was crazy fun. I'm so glad we are so close as friends now... So...you & Callie , you guys had lots of common friends. What was their take in all this ?_

_Arizona - They choose her. And I thank god everyday that they choose her. She was without me...god she couldn't have survived if they wouldn't have been there for her. _

_April - Then how did you survived? *Arizona looks down* How did you survived Arizona?_

_Arizona - I didn't ._

_April - So what did you do then ? _

_Arizona - I seeked help. I seeked you. And you diagnosed me with Post Trauma Stress Disorder..._

_April - The first time you acknowledged that you do have a disorder...How was it ?_

_Arizona - I don't know... Awful ? I'm a world-class pedes surgeon...How could be any mental setback be any good for me...that's why I was in denial for a very long time..._

_April - And then one day you agreed that you do have PTSD... When was that ?_

_Arizona - It was the day Callie kicked me out of our house... I mean her house..._

_April - Your house ! How was it ? Getting kicked out of your own house ? _

_Arizona - Yeah...my house ! When she left me...I kept myself together with our memories...they eased out the pain...the loneliness... I used to sleep at night looking at the empty pillow besides mine...remembering that we used to be together...inseparable? *tears rolling down the face* .. I could just feel her in that house...feel near me... I would just picture everything and breathe my days out...fight the lonely nights out... But then...then..._

_April - She kicked you out._

_Arizona - yeah...and it took every last ounce of life out of me...it took every hope I ever had to seek forgiveness out of me...it crushed my every dream to get back together with her. I was dead. I was dead for her a longtime ago. But now i was dead for me. The pain, the guilt, the remorse...it was just too much... Too much for me to bear. _

_April - Why didn't you tell her that ?_

_Arizona - Why do you think it was any easy on her ? She was in as much pain as I was. I could see her pain. See how much i have shooked her... I destroyed her faith in love...love has been her only saviour...and i destroyed that. She needed something to fight her pain & if hurting me back was her way to ease out the pain...then i was happy to be that person that she could hate...that she could blame...that she could bash...It was what keeping her steady ..._

_April - What about you ? Clearly you had nobody..._

_Arizona - I.. I.. *looking desperate*_

_April - Ok... So Callie, she was married to George, who cheated on her...then there was Erica & as you have told me...she walked on her too and then there was the Mark Sloan...Sofia's father ! Callie's resume in love isn't exactly shiny either. But she gave second chances...she was ready to give George another chance. Then why it wasn't the same for you ?_

_Arizona - George & Erica both broke her heart...how much more heart-break do you think she would've handled ? Everyone just keep failing her...i was'nt different either.._

_April - So you do agree that Callie's decision to end your relationship had everything to do with her earlier heart breaks ?_

_Arizona - *looking confused* No. No...Where are you going with this ? It wasn't like this in our previous sessions ?_

_April - *thumping the table* Just answer the questions Dr. Robbins !_

_Arizona - *leaning on table* I WAS DIFFERENT . I wasn't George or Erica for her. She loved me beyond them. So it hurt her more when I broke her heart..._

_April - *raising her voice* But it COULD have been different if you WOULD have been the first person to break her heart...Callie could have been compassionate..._

_Arizona - *standing up* I didn't deserve that compassion !_

_April - Yes you did ! You lost your friend, you almost died in a plane crash, you lost your leg, your baby died...you made a mistake and lost your family...what makes you think you didn't deserve compassion? *Arizona was speechless*_

On The Left Side of Glass -

_Callie was speechless. Shocked, confused, overwhelmed all at the same time. She couldn't think, there were no words in her mouth. She was just staring at Arizona behind the glass, listening to her voice, who even through all this was still defending her. She didn't know whether she should feel happy to have Arizona in her life, to have someone who'll love her through everything, who'll love her even when all she did in return was hate her. Or she should feel sad for hurting Arizona so much, for giving upon on their relationship...for not being able to see her pain. She just kept staring..._

_Meredith - God ! I feel awful for not seeing all this..._

_Bailey - This woman is stronger than we all can imagine...look at her...still standing strong...holding herself together..._

On The Right Side of Glass -

_April knew she's taking things beyond limits and Arizona might never forgive her for all this, that she might lose this project completely but still she wanted to help her friend rise above all the loads of coal thrown at her. She wanted the respect in everyone else's eyes that she had for Arizona. She knew that she's kind of putting Arizona's relationship on stake with all this but a part of her knew that Callie & Arizona aren't exactly doing any better. Yes they are on mend but they aren't going any further by holding back stuffs that should have been on platter a long time ago. Holding back the true feelings had costed April her marriage, she didn't want that for Arizona. She calmed her down._

_April - So ... What's done is done. How was it after Callie threw you out ?_

_Arizona - Miserable ! I...checked into a hotel...to spent my miserable sleepless nights... tried to pretend that nothing affects me anymore.._

_April - Did you had any hopes that Callie might forgive you ?_

_Arizona - No. None... I didn't even imagined a universe in which she'll forgive me..._

_April - Why ? *Arizona looks downwards*... Why Arizona?_

_Arizona - *raising her voice* because I never forgive myself for what I did to her...to us. Why on earth should she ? Where are you going with all this...this is not how it was in our previous sessions?_

_April - *extending some water* Breath in Ok. I know we didn't discuss this earlier...but we're gonna discuss it now...just be honest to yourself and let it all out... So...at that time we had already started these sessions...did it helped ?_

_Arizona - of course! Definitely! Talking to you...had helped me think straight through all this..._

_April - But it still wasn't easy...So i suggested some shutting down of emotions...some ignoring the pain and crap stuffs and seeking some..._

_Arizona - physical comfort ! *laughs*_

_April - *winks* Well I told you to keep it out of the hospital... *laughs*_

On The Left Side of Glass -

_Callie had enough. She couldn't handle any of this anymore. She was looking at others who were looking at her relationship being flayed piece by piece. No. They don't have any rights to dive in her personal life. They don't get to judge her or Arizona or their relationship._

_Callie - *standing up* OK ENOUGH ! ENOUGH OF ALL THIS. I'm calling this off. None of you get to have any response in my life or our relationship._

_*All of them were so engrossed in April & Arizona's conversation that Callie's shouting startled them*_

_Meredith - Callie..._

_Callie - NO. *making her way to the glass door*_

_Cristina - Callie stop...listen to Arizona..._

_Callie was too much pissed off at the whole scenario that she wasn't paying much attention to where April & Arizona's conversation has reached. But it was all buzzing clearly through the intercom._

_April - So when was it that I suggested you to seek physical comfort ? * Arizona looks crestfallen*... When was it ?_

_Arizona - we don't have to go there..._

_April - YES. We do ! WHEN WAS IT ?_

_Arizona - It was after I had those surges ..._

_April - What kind of surges ? * Arizona goes speechless *... WHAT KIND OF SURGE ARIZONA?_

_Arizona - *standing up & backing off* I can't go there again._

_April - *thumping the table* WHAT KIND OF SURGE ARIZONA !?_

_Arizona - APRIL !_

_April - WHAT KIND OF SURGE ARIZONA ?_

_Arizona - *shouting* SURGE TO KILL MYSELF. SURGE TO END THIS LIFE. SURGE TO END IT ALL !_

_Callie went numb. Her hands that have just reached the door knob go cold & stoned. It was like the ground beneath her has shifted. It was like a blow to her...to even think that she would've lost Arizona...that she almost killed her, shooked her ground. She went boneless in an instant and slipped to the floor. Cristina tried to reach out for her but Meredith held her back._

_Meredith - no ! Let her think for herself...nothing you say can comfort her._

_Karev - God ! Robbins had been through hell already and yet Torres pushed her deeper..._

_Owen - They both had been through hell...it just could had been easier if they would have been there for each other._

_Webber - Universe screwed them big time.. I guess..._

_Arizona was trembling with tears. April reached out for her._

_April - I think this call for a break. You ok !_

_Arizona - Yeah... I guess...I could use a break_

_April - We will talk about your amputation after the break.._

_Arizona - *with a nervous laugh* hmmm Charming ! * Arizona makes her way out*_

_After Arizona is gone, April makes her way towards the other side of the glass. One look at the disheveled Callie sitting on the floor & others looking a bit ashamed and April knew that she had hit the right spot. None of them could even pull a pleasantry ._

_April - So we are done for this session. I'll hopefully see y'all at 6pm again._

_Everyone nodded and walked out except Callie. She pulled herself together, stood up and turned towards April. Before she could say anything, April stopped her._

_April - Go ahead. Yell at me. Yell all you want. But that won't change the truth. She was hurt...as much as you were._

_Callie - You think you can get away with this Kepner ? You think you are a good friend ? You think she's gonna forgive you for making a show out of her miseries... Well guess what... We're done. This is it. I'm gonna tell her all about it & then you & your project can go to hell._

_April - Go ahead. Tell her. But then you'll never find out why it all happened. Why she fall apart...what exactly was her PTSD. *Callie storms off, April calls out* . She's never gonna tell you on her own Callie, cause she knows that it'll hurt you. And she can never hurt you on purpose._

➡Callie was distressed. She was frantically searching for Arizona when Leah walked into her.

_Leah - Dr. Torres I'm on your service today and I checked all your post ops..._

_Callie - *pissed* Not now Murphy *she makes her way to the lab, Leah follows*_

_Leah - But Dr. Torres this patient has some complications and i would like you to have a look on her charts..._

_Callie - You're a resident now Murphy. You can't even figure out some random complications? I guess you need to spend more time concentrating on your work then screwing an attending._

_Leah was in shock with Callie's outburst. Callie knew she went a little overboard. So she took the charts and gave it a look._

_Leah - you don't have any right to comment on my personal life._

_Callie - *pissed* and you have rights to screw my wife ?_

_Leah - You guys were separated... I didn't lure her out of your relationship. She was single..._

_Callie - She was married..._

_Leah - SEPARATED ! You guys broke up. You kicked her out..._

_Callie - That's none of your business!_

_Leah - It is damn business. Whether you like it or not...i'm here in this equation. I tell you what... I'll tell you why you are so pissed...You're not mad because your wife got involved with me. You're mad cause you did everything so everyone could hate Arizona's gut and yet she found me._

_Callie - Stop It !_

_Leah - I mean who likes a cheating wife right ? Who likes a cheater ? You did everything Dr. Torres. You did everything so that everybody in this dam hospital would just hate Arizona._

_Callie - YOU'RE CROSSING YOUR LIMITS MURPHY..._

_Leah - You think i fall for her ? NO. I FALL FOR HER LOVE FOR YOU. I WANTED TO BE YOU. Cause even through all this, nothing could shake her love for you. I wanted to become you in her life. *Callie went speechless* But that was never possible. Cause all she ever wanted was you, your happiness._

_Callie - *ignoring Leah* I know it sucks for you..._

_Leah - You didn't hear me. I didn't wanna be like you...i wanted her love for you...but I never wanted to become like you. You think you are some epitome of love or something? No ! Look at yourself...look inside. You never loved her..._

_Callie - What ?_

_Leah - YOU NEVER LOVED HER. YOU NEVER LOVED HER FOR HERSELF. YOU LOVED HER FOR YOURSELF . You loved her not because she was she, you loved her because she made you happy. And you walked away when she couldn't make you happy anymore..._

_Callie - What the hell do you mean...I loved her even when we were not happy... I did everything for her when she lost her leg...I always loved her..._

_Leah - When she lost her leg ? Really ? She did the same 'everything' for you when you almost died in the car crash. And you guys weren't even tied to a marriage back then. She did that for love. What you did, was for your marriage. All you ever wanted from her, was to make you happy. You never looked for her happiness..._

_Callie - *handing the charts back to Leah* Book a OR for surgery tomorrow AM. *starts walking away*_

_Leah - I was nothing. *Callie stops* I always knew that I am nothing for her. But i admired her...i admired her love for you. You think she was unaffected with whatever you were doing to her ? Ask her the length of time you guys were apart & you'll now the depth of her pain... the pain you gave her... I was just...I was easing out the pain that you caused her...I mean I tried that...I don't think it worked though...Cause all she ever wanted was you. *Callie walks away*_

➡Arizona made her way to the daycare first. Sofia was asleep, but one look at her daughter calmed her down. She went to the NICU, checked on some of her patients, crossed Karev who gave her a weird look and then finally she settled on her office couch. It always felt better after talking to April.

Callie at last found Arizona in her office. She was half asleep on couch. She went near her. The lines on Arizona's forehead were telling her that her dreams aren't that pretty, she placed her hand on her face and slowly the lines vanished. Yes she loves her, she loves her more than anything and nobody gets to tell her that she doesn't. As if the sudden fear of loosing Arizona striked her, Callie made her way to the couch and snuggled up to her. She rested her head on Arizona's chest & held her. It was the first time after their break up that she was feeling Arizona's heartbeat so close to her. Obviously it stirred Arizona awake. Arizona sensed the touch, the warmth. It felt like heaven to her. But it also told her that Callie must have been went through a bad day. Rough day with a patient or something like that. She could feel Callie's discomfort.

_Arizona - Heyy you okay !_

_Callie - *snuggling closer* yeah...just...hold me ok..._

_*Arizona settled her arm around Callie & held one of Callie's free hands *_

_Callie - No. Hold me tighter... *Arizona tightened her grip and placed a kiss on Callie's head*... Just don't let me go..._

_Arizona - I won't ! _

_Callie - Just don't ever leave..._

_Arizona - *Holding Callie more closer to her* - I... I never did..._

_They lie there in each others arms for a while and then Arizona felt some wetness on her shirt...Callie was crying. She sat up & cupped Callie's face. Tears were rolling down Callie's face and she kept on looking down._

_Arizona - *with sparkly eyes* hey what's wrong ?_

_Callie just kept staring down. She kept on asking herself...did she really went so low that she hurt Arizona so deeply?...Was her love so selfish that she never saw where Arizona's happiness was ? She knew she didn't have any answers...but she kept on searching herself._

_Arizona couldn't bear it. Callie was hurting, and all she wanted do was to take away that pain from her. So she leaned closer and kissed her. Kissed her deeply...passionately. Her hands never left Callie's face and as soon as Callie warmed to her kiss, her hands reached Arizona's neck and held her. For Arizona, it was everything. It was fire, it was ice, and it was melting. And as Callie deepened the kiss more...Arizona became more fluid and she flattened beneath Callie on the couch again. She was ready to give everything to this moment. For Callie, it was pure heaven. It was the first time Arizona was kissing her on her own & it was nothing like their earlier kiss. It was more intimate cause it touched her soul, her heart. All she wanted to do was give her everything to this kiss... To Arizona...to the love of her life. But then suddenly it settled on her. This was what Arizona has done all along. Arizona has kept on giving her everything just to make her smile, to take away her pain...to give her happiness. And she's doing the same thing now again. Suddenly it all started making sense to Callie...so she pulled back from the kiss and stood up abruptly, ready to leave. As she was about to leave, Arizona lunged forward and took hold of her hands. She was still dizzy from the kiss._

_Arizona - What's wrong ?_

_Callie - I have to go..._

_Arizona - *she pulled Callie & made her sit in front of her * is it me ? Did i do something wrong?_

_Callie - No. You never did anything wrong. I guess I'm the wrong one._

_A part of Callie was hurt, because she was never able to see this side of Arizona, a part of her was pissed off because Arizona never showed her hurting side to her. Arizona never trusted her with her hurting side...or she didn't wanted to hurt her...maybe that's why. Maybe it was cause She always seeked happiness...She didn't knew. Her emotions were turmoil..._

_Arizona - No. God. Callie please tell me...what's wrong..._

_Callie was again staring into nothingness so Arizona cupped her face again..._

_Arizona - Look at me... *Callie didn't looked up* HEYYY ! DO. NOT. SHUT ME OUT. OKAY..._

_Callie - *removing Arizona's hands from her face & standing up* Shut you out ? I'm shutting you out ? I'M SHUTTING YOU OUT ? It's not me, it's you god dammit ! It's YOU ! You are the one shutting me out. You are the one plastering a shiny face just to make me happy...well congratulations! Look I 'm so happy._

_Callie storms out of the room...leaving Arizona speechless._

↪↪ **Will Callie & Arizona go back for the second session? Will there be a second session ? Will they come out stronger out of this or will they fall apart being unable to bear so much pain. Come back for chapter 2 for more on the story. Hope you guys enjoyed it. **


	2. Chapter 2

Note: All the characters and the story itself are in AU. Well I'm trying my best to stick with originality of characters but they can get a bit overboard and may also go beyond their usual streak. Further I always prefer to tell my story in the form of conversation, like you can see the characters, see their emotions but yet what's inside their mind will stay under wraps. 

Crazy Ever After – Chapter 2

Callie made her way to her own office. She shut off the lights and sat on her chair & swiveled to the emptiness of the room staring at the dark ceiling. She kept on wondering where the hell she went wrong. She loved Arizona through everything. She gave her soul to her relationship. She did everything to make Arizona stand up on her feet again. She knew she broke her promise to save Arizona's leg but that was to save her life and she might make the same decision again if it's Arizona's life on stake. She started the brain mapping project for Arizona. To build her a prosthetic, as responsive as her lost leg. She did everything. Everything. She put her own soul in Arizona, just to make her feel complete. And after all THIS Arizona cheated on her. How the hell should she have reacted? She never intended to hurt Arizona so much but it was like her whole life, her whole love has been a lie. How was she supposed to be ok with it? How she should have known that what happened with Arizona was because of her PTSD? Maybe she took things a bit overboard by kicking Arizona out? Callie was too much overwhelmed too even think anymore. All she wanted to do was to find out what else Arizona's been holding back. She checked her watch, it was 1745 hours, she changed her clothes, dressed up in her casual top, jacket & jeans, and she made her way towards the counseling room.

In the counseling room:

As soon as Callie entered the room, all eyes turned towards her. She searched those eyes for hostility. The hostility she has noticed in those eyes for Arizona but all she could see was compassion. But this time the compassion was not only for her, it was for Arizona too, it was for them. She sat besides Meredith, who gave a reassurance pat on her back. Meredith has been really supportive towards her ever since the infidelity chapter. Callie has trusted her with her feelings & she knew Mer knows exactly how hard it has been for her.

Outside The Hospital:

It has started snowing a bit. There had been warnings of heavy snowfall ahead. Arizona just stood there, letting the dampness of snow soak into her soul. She's better now. She knows she's better now. But her relationship isn't. And she knows that she won't survive loosing Callie again. All she wanted to do was save her relationship but her past was still holding her heart hostage. She doesn't know how to move forward with all these cart webs still holding her back. A part of her knows that she has got to be honest with Callie, that she has to tell Callie how exactly she felt back then and how she feels now but she doesn't know how to do that without hurting Callie's feelings and sentiments. What if Callie didn't except her with her darkness? What if Callie is only trying to forgive her so she could get the Arizona she fell in love with before the plane crash? What if Callie will not be in love with her new-found self? She knows she can't be the old Arizona...What if Callie didn't like this new Arizona in her. These thoughts had haunted her ever since they got back. She closed her eyes and prayed for strength and then went back inside. It's time to go back to the counseling room. A part of her wished that she could ask April to schedule the recording some other time but there's also a part that wanted to get done with this already. So, she went ahead. It was 1800 hours when she entered the counseling room.

On the right side of the glass:

Arizona made her way towards her seat. April still wasn't there. She presumed she's behind the glass wall, probably giving some guidance to the camera crew seating behind, recording the sessions. She was right. Cause within few minutes, April emerged out of the glass door closing it behind her.

_April - heyy you're already here...hmm? Ready to start again?_

_Arizona - Ready get done with this._

_April - are you okay? You look stressed?_

_Arizona - Nah...just tired..._

April knew that Callie won't go ahead to tell Arizona all about this. She knew Callie wanted to know as much as she can about Arizona's dilemma. She was content to meet everyone on the other side of the glass, seating so sincerely to know more about Arizona. And this time she was even more determined to bring out every ounce of Arizona's true feelings.

_April - well I can reschedule if you want me to..._

_Arizona - oh no, no...Let's just finish it..._

_April - It'll take a hell lot of time...you okay with it? Or you can take this night off?_

_Arizona - No. I'm telling you...I'm okay. This is not some charming stuff to talk about, obviously it's stressing...but I'm fine...so let's start okay..._

_April - As you wish woman! So...from where we left...What after that? As you said, you didn't imagine that Callie will forgive you, but did you have any hopes...to get back together with her?_

_Arizona - I had those hopes. For a long time I was holding on to those hopes...but then one day even those hopes got crushed._

_April - When was that?_

_Arizona - Owen's Girlfriend Emma was here for job interview...she kind of told me that Callie flirted with her...that the interview was quite intimate...and it hit me...hit me right in the gut... It hit me that Callie must have moved on...that she must have seeked companionship somewhere else..._

_April - But it wasn't like that right?_

_Arizona - Of course not. I guess i misread things...I did asked Callie whether she got involved with anyone or not...she said she didn't._

_April - Why this notion made you give up on your hopes? Why didn't you imagine that it could be something like what you had?_

_Arizona - I didn't get involved with anyone because I wanted to move on. It was not like that... It was just for channeling my triggers of PTSD somewhere else... Come on?! You told me to channelize my mind somewhere else... I never moved on. I was always right there where Callie left me..._

_April - Did it helped?_

_Arizona - I don't know. I tried to talk to myself that it was helping...but I never felt comfortable with it..._

_April - So what helped?_

_Arizona - You helped. Talking to you helped. Sofia...my girl...spending time with her helped. My work...that helped. Acknowledging that I have a disorder & knowing what triggers it helped._

On the left side of the glass:

_Owen - *looking towards Callie* Wait Emma told Arizona that you flirted with her?_

_Callie - *confused* I asked her some personal questions about family & kids for you?! Gosh the woman thought I flirted with her?_

_Cristina - *side eyeing Owen* seems like a good thinker..._

_Bailey - Wait Callie...you and Arizona... Don't you guys ever talk? _

_Derek - They wouldn't have been in this place if they had just talked honestly..._

_Meredith - Well they didn't wanted to hurt each other...I guess?!_

_Karev - And that played out well?_

On the Right side of the glass:

_April - So...everything was done. You figured it out that Callie has moved on. You didn't even had any hopes of getting back again. You guys reached a point where you tried your best to stay cordial around each other for Sofia's sake & then the lawsuit happened!_

_Arizona - Yup_

_April - How was it for Callie?_

_Arizona - Well she was getting sued for no logical reasons...obviously she was distressed with it. _

_April - How do you know?_

_Arizona - What do you mean? I can always tell when she's hurting..._

_April - Even after everything?_

_Arizona - That has nothing to do with it... Just cause we grew apart doesn't mean that I can't see her pain anymore_

_April - *nodding* Okay! Arizona now I want you to answer my questions as quickly as you can. Like rapid fire ok... So during this lawsuit... you were there for her?_

_Arizona - In every possible way..._

_April - Why?_

_Arizona - An employee of this hospital was getting sued...come on? All of us were there?_

_April - Why were you there?_

_Arizona - To support her._

_April - What else?_

_Arizona - Because like I told you...I can always tell when she's stressing out..._

_April - *leaning on the table* WHAT ELSE?_

_Arizona - SHE WAS GETTING SUED, but she's still married to me. Jury responds better to married woman with family. I WAS HER FAMILY. Where are you going with this April? It wasn't like this in our previous sessions?_

_April - *smiling & settling back* Even after all your hopes were crushed, even after everything Callie put you through...you were still looking out for her. _

_Arizona - *settling back* Yes!_

_April - And then after the lawsuit...when Callie realised that people do sometimes make mistakes that's completely out of their hands...She came back to you !?_

_Arizona - Yes. _

_April - So did she forgive you for what you did? _

_Arizona - No. She was ready to try again._

_April - and that was enough for you to just forget all your miseries and get back to her?_

_Arizona - *raising her voice* I CHEATED ON HER APRIL & she was ready start fresh. What else could I have asked for?_

_April - So you are saying you were completely unaffected by what she did to you?_

_Arizona - yes...i guess...it wasn't her fault...she was hurt._

_April - And you weren't? How many days were you guys apart?_

_Arizona - *blurting out* 83 days..._

_April - *settling down* you were hurt Arizona. You were hurt as much as she was but you choose to ignore yourself again. You choose to go back to her..._

On the Left side of the glass:

April's words took Callie back to Leah's words _"ask her how many days you guys were apart",_ she realized that she has hurt Arizona much deeply than she can imagine, than what Arizona is showing. It was overwhelming for Callie cause she never intended to hurt her but still somehow she has.

On the Right side of the glass:

_April - *flipping through files* so going back to the plane crash & amputation. It was hard?_

_Arizona - duh?_

_April - So you said Callie promised she won't let anyone cut off your leg?_

_Arizona - She did that to save my life._

_April - so why did you blamed her?_

_Arizona - *guiltily* I never wanted this life for me. I never wanted to be an amputee. For a very long time my life was a burden on me. She made a promise & when she didn't keep that, all I could think was that Callie saved me for herself._

_April - did that notion changed?_

_Arizona - Eventually! Yes it did! I figured that it wasn't easy on her either..._

_April - Why did you blamed her?_

_Arizona - It wasn't easy...to be handicapped...to be incomplete. It was awfully hard & it always reminded me of those hideous days in woods. I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream...I just...wanted to let my pain out...and..._

_April - and anguish & wrath were the only ways to do that..._

_Arizona - Yes. _

_April - So basically you channelized all your hurt, anguish & wrath towards Callie. What made you think she would be okay with it?_

_Arizona - I was holding on to her promises. She promised me that she would never leave me. _

_April - Okay...moving ahead...*looking down* Well those are some nice pair of silhouettes you got there... Eventually things got better?_

_Arizona - yup! Callie...she basically did everything to put me back together...to pull me out of the darkness. Slowly & steadily we moved ahead..._

_April - And then?_

_Arizona - Then I realised I can't count on my slow key recovery._

_April - When was that?_

_Arizona - When Callie indicated that we need to move forward... both psychologically and intimately._

_April - *flipping through files* well you guys were out of physical intimacy for what? Umm 5 months. _

_Arizona - yeah & when Callie indicated that... I realised that I can't count on becoming confident in myself... That Callie needs me to be a wife._

_April - How hard was that? You guys were in love...why it was so difficult for you?_

_Arizona - I was still in pain back then. My phantom limb pain was getting more & more worse. I tried...I tried my level best to be a wife. I never told Callie about my pain... I never told her about my haunting nightmares... I slept on the bathroom floor... I tried...but I kept failing her... I was scared... I was scared if kept on failing that I might lose her._

On the Left side of the glass:

_Callie - *holding her head* I... I...How the hell was I supposed to know all this?_

_Owen - She's telling the truth... I helped her during her phantom limb pain phase... Even back then she told me that she wants to be a wife...that Callie needs her to be a wife..._

_Callie - *looking towards Owen* you should have told me that..._

_Meredith - *looking towards __Arizona __* She should have told you that..._

On the Right side of the glass:

_April - So did you succeeded? In finding your happiness in her happiness?_

_Arizona - *smiling* yeah...we did. I was happy. I was content. Everyday with her was a blessing for me. She made me the happiest person in the world..._

_April - Then you planned a family. Another baby to have more happiness in your life._

_Arizona - yes. I got pregnant. We were so happy about it. We even planned to buy a house. I was literally so content..._

_April - And then..._

_Arizona - *choking on words* we lost the baby... I was shattered... It was like dying all over again... I couldn't bear it... It was like i slipped back to from where I started..._

_April - *getting hold of Arizona's hand* you okay? *Arizona nods* Callie was there for you?_

_Arizona - It was hard on her too... I guess...she didn't wanted to acknowledge that our baby has died...she wanted to move forward..._

_April - She wanted you to try again? *Arizona nods* Why?_

_Arizona - She wanted to leave all the miseries behind... She was looking towards finding happiness all over again..._

_April - What about you?_

_Arizona - I was in darkness...completely! It was impossible for me to even think about another baby. Look at me...the universe doesn't wanted to give me happiness...how could have I fight for it? I didn't have that heart... & above all I was failing Callie... I was failing to give her happiness... *crying* I was nothing...nobody...there was nothing in me to love..._

On the Left side of the glass:

Callie was overwhelmed with hurt & guilt. She never wanted this to happen to them. But when it did happen, all she wanted to do was fix it... She never knew this would make Arizona spiral downwards. She looked at others; there wasn't a dry eye in the room...except Meredith, who was seemingly lost in some other thoughts. Callie looked at Arizona, wanting to reach her, wanting to wipe away her tears...but she couldn't. Her own tears were making her vision blurry; she wiped them away & concentrated on the conversation again.

On the Right side of the glass:

_April - So during your dark days of nothingness & low self esteem...this *looking at file* Boswell chick walked in your life._

_Arizona - Slut_

_April - *controlling a laugh* well I prefer whore but okay Slut is fine..._

_Arizona - I wish I could see her intentions..._

_April - You had PTSD Arizona & that woman was giving a rub to your otherwise negligible self-esteem... So were you attracted to her?_

_Arizona - No. God No. I wasn't attracted to her. I was attracted to the notion that someone was attracted to me...& she didn't knew me before... It felt like even in my incompleteness I was enough for her..._

_April - thinking back...how does it feel now? Do you think she was attracted to you?_

_Arizona - No the slut just wanted sex. Looking back I can tell...she just treated me like a use & throw object._

_April - So you do regret it?_

_Arizona - Is that even a question? I regretted it from the minute it happened. I still do. I wish I could just erase it from my life. I knew i made the biggest mistake in my life... I knew that... But there was no turning back...I was crestfallen._

_April - What about Callie?_

_Arizona - I drove a dagger through her heart... Of course it was hard on her..._

_April - Did you tell her...that you made a mistake...?_

_Arizona - Yes. _

_April - Did you told her how you felt? What you were going through?_

_Arizona - No. I mean I tried to...but at that time the deception was too hard on her..._

_April - She didn't even want to hear what you had to say?_

_Arizona - *searching for answers* It was...was hard on her..._

_April - She didn't even think that your relationship was worth of at least a conversation?_

_Arizona - She...She was trying..._

_April - She walked away..._

_Arizona - *frazzled* It was... It was hard on her..._

_April - You didn't ask for forgiveness...you were just asking for one conversation..._

_Arizona - APRIL! Why are you channelling this conversation towards blaming Callie? She was hurt... It wasn't her fault..._

_April - *standing up* ONE CONVERSATION!_

_Arizona - SHE. WAS. HURT *standing up* you know what? We're not doing this.., I'm done... I'm calling this off...find someone else... *pointing towards the glass door* I'm taking those recordings with me... *walks towards the glass door*_

_April - *panicking* ARIZONA STOP... STOP.. ST..._

It was too late, as Arizona has already opened the door. April's face went white as Arizona made her way to the other side... She followed.

On the Left side of the glass :

It was uncalled. No one was prepared to face Arizona like that. Every one of them was speechless. As Arizona stared at them in utter horror, they just sat there holding their breaths. Arizona's eye darted from everyone in the room to April who was standing behind her. She was dumbstruck and the ground beneath gave away when the realisation hit her. It was a set up. Arizona flattened out on the glass wall as it all started making sense to her that every one of these people has saw her confession. Finally Arizona's hand made its way to her mouth as she choked on to the sight of Callie, her eyes were red & she was staring at her hands in her laps. She stared in disbelief and horror as April at last broke the silence in the room.

_April - *reaching out for Arizona* Arizona... I..._

_Arizona - *forcing her to speak & backing off to April's touch* No... No...How could you...how... _

Arizona choked on to her tears and ran away from the room. Every one stood up to their feet to stop her.

_Callie - *wiping away her tears & making her way out* This is what I was afraid of..._

_April - *guiltily to Callie* Not you..._

_Callie - *confused* Excuse me? *pointing towards the direction Arizona went* That's my life falling apart.._

_April - She can't face you right now...you..._

_Bailey - *stepping between Callie & April* *to Callie* you... You are too much pressure... She can't face you right now...she's scared..._

_Callie - Bailey! *pointing to April* How can you take her side?_

_Karev - Bailey is right Torres! Robbins will not be able to face you right now..._

Callie's eyes searched each of her friend's eyes for some support but they all were suggesting the same thing.

_Callie - *in shock* I can't believe you people...I_

_Meredith - *stepping in* I'll go. *holding Callie* heyy I'll go for her...trust me ok...you can trust her with me..._

The look in Meredith's eye reassured Callie & she sat down holding her head as Meredith made her way out.

_Karev - *looking at his watch* Dammit its past midnight... I need a drink..._

_Webber - I need an aspirin!_

_Derek - *to April* Kepner I think we should call it a night... We can continue tomorrow am..._

_April - *confused* only if Arizona comes back for tomorrow..._

_Owen - I don't get you April. This was probably your only chance for your project...you knew it was Arizona...you should have told us. We could have chosen some other case study..._

_Jackson - *eyeing April* She did it on purpose. It looks like she did it for her but I know she did it for Arizona... Look at all of us...we definitely have more respect for Arizona now... April just did what a friend should have done..._

_Bailey - *taking hold of Callie* Lets go. You need to sleep..._

_Callie - what makes you think I can sleep?_

_Bailey - Then we will just lie down okay... Let's go... I'll drop you home._

_Callie - No! What about Arizona?_

_Derek - Mer will take care of that..._

Callie unwillingly dragged herself with Bailey. Every cell in her body just wanted to go to Arizona but a part of her knew that everyone's right. Arizona needs some time & space.

At the apartment:

Callie made her way in. Bailey & Cristina had tried to make her gulp some food but she didn't have any appetite. Her mind was rushing with a million thoughts. She knew one thing. She loves Arizona & she'll love her no matter what. Her eyes settled on their couch. Ever since they got back, Arizona has been bunking on it. Though she had told her that she can sleep on the bed, in fact Arizona literally asked for it but later she just wanted to bunk on the couch until things were better between them. Callie made her way to the couch & lie down on it; she inhaled into Arizona's fragrance & felt content. She was glad that Cristina is keeping Sofia tonight. She stared into the nothingness of the dark ceiling & just lie there with open eyes thinking about Arizona. She's still clueless about Arizona's PTSD. She needs to know what exactly were her triggers but now She was afraid that Arizona might not go back to complete her sessions. Well if Arizona decides to not go back, then she'll support her. She was against this from the very start...but she'll also make sure that Arizona tells her all about it. But...will Arizona tell her? On her own? What was the reason she kept it all to herself for so long? Doesn't Arizona trusts her any more? What happened to the bond of trust & faith between them?

All these questions kept Callie awake. The more she tried to reason herself, the more confused she got.

Outside the hospital

Arizona just sat there on the bench. It was her fave spot, towards the far end of the parking lot, just dimly lit by a street lamp, shaded with a maple tree. Perfect peaceful ambience. There weren't anymore tears in her eyes. She's probably out of tears. It has snowed earlier, so the grass beneath her feet was damp. She got rid of her heels & let her right feet feel the dampness & coldness. Though it was freezing outside, but still she hasn't bought her overall coat. The cold was calming to her and she was not ready to go back in there & face everyone. She just sat there thinking about the worst case scenario of her confession. By now, she's used to feel small, so she was not worried about what others may think of her. Technically she's done with PTSD so the board can't stop her from practicing medicine but will they take any action against her for hiding her earlier medical condition? Well her PTSD never took over her working skills. She's still a great surgeon. So nope, they probably won't do that. But what about Callie? Sure it must have been a shock to her. Will she forgive her for hiding all of this from her? Well that adds up to the number of things she needs to seek forgiveness for. But will Callie be able to do that? Except her with so many flaws? Why would Callie forgive her? She's a walking talking flaw machine after all, who would like to have her in their life? And what if Callie does forgive her...will she be ever able to live up to Callie's expectations? She failed her...repeatedly...Is she strong enough now to even deserve Callie's forgiveness?

All these thoughts kept throbbing Arizona's mind when she noticed a shadow approaching her. Is it Callie? No. Doesn't look like her. Is she waiting for Callie to come out for her? Finally Arizona noticed it's Meredith. Why is she here? To sympathize with her?

Meredith made her way towards Arizona; it has taken her a half an hour to find her. She told herself that this is not the time to confront Arizona but a part of her knows that it's now or never. She took a seat besides Arizona.

_Meredith - *rubbing her hands* we should go inside. It's damn cold here..._

_Arizona - I'm fine. Really. You can go._

_Meredith - what makes you think I'm here for you? The world doesn't just revolve around you Arizona... I'm here for Callie._

_Arizona was taken aback._

_Arizona - *confused* *startled* what about her? Is she okay? Mer... Is she okay?_

_Meredith - *looking towards Arizona* How can she be okay? After what you put you through... How do you expect her to be okay?_

_Arizona - I know..._

_Meredith - *shutting Arizona midway* No you don't know anything. You don't have any idea about anything..._

_Arizona - what do you mean?_

_Meredith - you both went through hell. Why do you think it was any easy on her?_

_Arizona - I never said it was easy on Callie... I always knew it was equally hard on both of us...the plane crash...the amputation..._

_Meredith - *shutting Arizona again* NO! NO it wasn't equally hard. It was harder on her..._

_Arizona - I was there in the woods with you Mer...You know how hard it was...to die...everyday... I lost my leg... I_

_Meredith - Shut it! I know all this. But did you ever imagine what it was like? For Callie? *Arizona was confused & shocked*. Callie... She relived those moments that we spent in the woods...everyday when she fought for justice for you...for Mark. It was devastating for her to show up everyday & take a stand for you & for Mark, to speak on your behalf, to explain your miseries to them word by word...moment by moment. For what? For herself? No! She fought for justice for you Arizona. _

Arizona went white. What Meredith was saying was tearing her apart because it was all so true.

_Meredith - Did you ever imagined... What it was like for her to be the one to decide to amputate your leg? To be caught in a situation where she had to decide whether to save you or save your leg? Put yourself in her shoes...what would you have done? Would you let her die? Did you ever imagine what it was like to be the best orthopedic surgeon in the world & yet become so helpless in a moment? Did you ever realised how hard it was for her?_

_Arizona - *tears rolling down her face* I do. I did... I _

_Meredith - *standing up* No! You didn't. Because if you had realised that than you wouldn't have treated her like crap. Did she ever complained? No! She inhaled every blames you had to offer. She knew that your anguish is the only way for you to let out your pain, and she happily took that all on her. For what? Herself? No...That was for you Arizona!_

_Arizona - *searching herself for answers* I knew I was being awful..._

_Meredith - Awful? The word you use is 'Awful'? *pointing fingers to Arizona * you were hostile Arizona! Did you ever imagined what Callie was going through back then? What it was for her to see her best friend slipping to death everyday for one whole month? To look towards you for some support and all she ever got in return was hostility? For what? Saving your life?_

As the realisation hit Arizona, her hands clutched her head in desperation. She went speechless.

_Meredith - *calming a bit down* I know it wasn't easy on you either Arizona. But it was harder on her. Did you ever imagined how it was for her to see Mark die in front of her eyes? To become so helpless...to stand on a fluid ground & seek your support so desperately... What did you gave her? More blames? More hostility? Did she complained? No...Instead she gave you support! She made herself that shoulder that you could lean upon & that heart that you could blame whenever you felt miserable..._

Meredith looked towards Arizona, she knew Arizona is sinking to her words but she has also seen Callie's sinking side & she can't just sit on it.

_Meredith - You. You made her sleep on her dead best friend's bed Arizona. At that time...when she wanted to just curl up to you and mourn Mark's death...you made her sleep at his apartment... And she did that...gladly... Don't think that just because she was smiling in front of you that it was easy for her... It was killing her...everyday._

Suddenly it all became too much for Arizona. She couldn't bear anymore of it. She stood up to leave, but Meredith blocked her way & continued.

_Meredith - *with a cracking voice* She used to hide & cry Arizona. We have seen her crying...for you...for Mark... She used to hide away in supply closet...in her office... & just cry. You know what? When people used to go through a bad day, they go home & cry... But Callie? She used to cry here at work...and then go home to you with a smiley face & strong determined attitude...just for you woman. Just for you. So that you won't collapse... So that you could lean on to her..._

Arizona sinked to the bench again, staring into the darkness, looking at her past, at all those times when she was unbelievably harsh on Callie. It sent a chill down her spine as she choked on to just the thought of it.

_Meredith - And after all THIS she choose to seek happiness...she choose to move forward... Who wouldn't do that?_

Meredith stared at Arizona, looking for some answer but Arizona was radio silent.

_Meredith - *calmly* you were going through a painful time... Why didn't you told her that? I still don't know what your PTSD is...so I am not judging you...but she would have understand that Arizona..._

Meredith & Arizona just sat there for few moments in silence. Arizona was clueless on what to think. Meredith was wondering whether she should continue or not, so she kneeled in front of Arizona & took hold of Arizona's hands.

_Meredith - I went through a miscarriage too & I know how hard it is. I know that. I know very well why you didn't wanted another baby... When they took Zola away from us, even I didn't wanted another baby & yes only for that moment Callie was wrong. She was wrong to push you to think about another baby... But she was looking towards happiness & it was not just for her...it was for both of you. *raising her voice* and it was not just your baby... It was her's too. You both lost the baby. Yeah she choose to move ahead again...because there was no point in holding back to darkness._

_*standing up* She choose happiness for you. And you gave her what? Deception? Betrayal?_

Arizona finally pulled herself together. And made herself speak.

_Arizona - *shouting* WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE I ENJOYED WHAT I DID. IT WAS A MISTAKE. I never wanted it to happen... God I don't even defend myself because I always knew that what I did was wrong..._

_Meredith - *raising her voice* I'm not saying that... I know you regret it...but what about her? Do you think, just cause she was being cold to you that it was not killing her? Can you imagine what it was for her to love you so much & then hurt you so much? Yeah she wronged you...but it was your doing Arizona... YOU SHOOK THE ANGEL IN HER. Ever imagined what it was like for her to try so hard to forget you...to hate you & yet being not able to do that? 83 days? You look at those 83 days as the time she took to give your relationship a chance... Why don't you look at them as the time she took to forget you & yet she couldn't...?_

_Arizona - I... I..._

_Meredith - yes she didn't thought that your relationship was worth a conversation but what about you? Did you tried? To talk to her again? She was pissed; of course she was going to walk out on you... but what about you? Did you stopped her? Held her back? Made her listen? Told her about your PTSD?_

_Arizona - I... I didn't knew back then that I had PTSD...I..._

_Meredith - But you didn't tried...maybe she just wanted you to fight for her... But you? You just gave up..._

_Arizona - *standing up* I never gave up... I was always there where she left me..._

_Meredith - But you didn't fought for her either..._

_Arizona - *raising her voice* I never gave up. I never knew whether she would ever be able to forgive me? Love me? I never gave up..._

_Meredith - *calmly* you do realise that you guys wouldn't have been in this situation if you guys just had talked honestly... If you would have been honest with her..._

_Arizona - I realised that..._

_Meredith - And now she's looking out for the same honesty again... Like I said, I don't know what your PTSD is, what exactly is holding you back...but I would like to know about it... Callie. She deserves to know about it... *putting her arm around Arizona* ... So... Come back tomorrow afternoon...finish your session...let it all out... We..._

Arizona suddenly got pissed again about the fact that April, Meredith & others set her up. No. They don't deserve to judge her miseries or her relationship. None of them do. She jerked Meredith's arm behind and started making her way towards the parking lot.

_Meredith - I'm hoping you'll show up._

_Arizona - *turning around & backing away* No. None of you get to have a show of our miseries... So... No..._

_Meredith - Callie would..._

_Arizona - *walking backwards* No...You don't get to tell me what Callie wants..._

_Meredith - *calling out* you know what? Go to hell... I don't care... Do whatever you want but just know one thing... You & Callie... You are both alike but there's one big difference..._

_Arizona's pace slowed a bit._

_Meredith - Callie. She always made you her STRENGTH. But you. You always made her your WEAKNESS..._

Meredith stared, as Arizona disappeared in the parking lot. She examined her watch; it was 4am, so she made her way towards her car too. She didn't knew whether what she told Arizona made any difference, but she was feeling content.

In the apartment:

It was dawn when Arizona made her way in. She was blocking out her thought process. It was too much stressful. She carefully tip toed in and then noticed Callie sleeping on the couch. One look on Callie's angelic face and all her worries & stress disappeared. Arizona got rid of her jacket, pulled out her shoes and went near Callie noiselessly. She was mesmerised by Callie's beauty, her innocent face, and her baby expressions. Arizona smiled to Callie's innocence and carefully tucked one of Callie's hair locks behind her ear. Then she carefully tucked her under the blanket and even more carefully placed a tender kiss on Callie's forehead. As her lips touched Callie's skin, a tear slipped down Arizona's eyes and made its way to Callie's face. Arizona felt like her cold hands could be too harsh on Callie's face and could awake her, so she wiped her eyes clean & leaned closer to kiss that tear drop away from Callie's face. As her lips touched Callie's cheek, Arizona inhaled into her fragrance & cherished that moment for a bit...

Then as if she got too much overwhelmed with emotions, Arizona abruptly backed off & made her way inside to their bedroom.

Callie was awake. She was awake all the time. She missed Arizona's touch as soon as Arizona backed off. The kiss was tender, but it felt like heaven to her. She was afraid if she had opened her eyes, the moment would have been ruined. She watched from underneath of her eye lashes as Arizona went inside. Then she heard some noises from the bathroom, Arizona is probably taking a shower. After about half an hour, around 7am, Arizona came out of their room. Freshly dressed in a purple shirt and black jeans, Arizona was breathtakingly stunning to her. Callie's eyes settled on Arizona's damp short hairs and she immediately felt a twinge to run her hands through it. Oh! How much she missed doing that. She looked, as Arizona dropped her black cardigan on the sofa across hers and then made her way to the kitchen. It was really getting hard for Callie to keep her eyes close and watch Arizona in all her lovableness. Soon her nostrils got filled with the mouth-watering smell of crispy bacon & cinnamon toasts & hot coffee. Callie's stomach growled at the fragrance & then she saw Arizona holding a tray & making her way towards her. She was right. Arizona has made her a yummy breakfast of Scrambled eggs, cinnamon toasts, bacon and coffee. She saw Arizona placing the tray on the coffee table in front of her, and then picking up her jacket from the other sofa. Wait? She's not gonna eat. Callie closed her eye shut as Arizona made her way near her one more time and caressed her face with the back of her hand.

Arizona was about to step out of the apartment when Callie sat up, she had her back towards Arizona & she didn't turned around. She just spoke from that same position.

_Callie - EAT!_

_Arizona - *bit startled* you...you're up? *she wondered whether Callie was awake all this time*_

_Callie - EAT!_

_Arizona - I... I talked to Cristina; she's bringing Sofia to park... I thought I would pick her up from there..._

_Callie - *finally turning around & facing Arizona* you haven't eaten since yesterday... So EAT!_

_Arizona - *fumbling* Oh no! I grabbed a bite last night at...at..._

_Callie - No. You haven't. So EAT!_

_Arizona - Sofia...she..._

_Callie - I'll go with you. You eat. I'll be ready in a few minutes..._

_Arizona - *realising that she can't reason Callie* what about you? You haven't eaten either..._

_Callie - Then eat with me. Just give me a moment, I'll be ready._

Arizona re warmed the coffee pot again as Callie went inside to get ready. She was expecting a bombard of questions but as always Callie was being patient with her. As she was setting the table, Callie emerged out of their bedroom wearing an off white shirt & black jeans. Arizona was awestruck. The way Callie has rolled up the sleeves of her shirt, the way her hands were so full with jacket & handbag & phone & yet she was trying to put her ear- ring on, the way her heels were making a rhythmic noise as she walked towards her, took Arizona's breath away. She was mesmerised by Callie's stunning beauty.

Callie kept her stuff aside & sat down struggling a bit more with her ear-ring. Arizona just kept staring at her. Then suddenly as if it all gets a bit awkward, Arizona broke the silence first.

_Arizona - umm may I?_

Callie looked at Arizona & the sudden rush to have her hands on her body hit her again. She nodded in affirmation. As Arizona came & stood near her, she pulled her hair to one side so Arizona could put on the ear-ring on her ear.

As soon as Arizona's hand touched Callie's ear lobe, they both felt sparkling sensation down their body. They miss it. The touch, the desire, the need to have each other. They both miss it desperately. The power of attraction has always been too strong between them.

Finally they both had their first meal since yesterday & surprisingly both of them licked their plates clean. They talked about the weather, the snowfall, Sofia and other off topics.

_Callie - *looking at Arizona's empty plate* How come you were not hungry?_

_Arizona - I wasn't. I swear I wasn't. But then I saw you & then the food & hunger took over me *laughs*_

_Callie - *sipping coffee* *laughing* It took over me too...god I am so full..._

_Arizona - Ummm Callie... *Callie looked towards her* were you awake? The whole time? You know...when I got back?_

_Callie - *teasingly* No! Why? Did anything happened?_

_Arizona - *blushing* Oh No. I was just wondering... *examining her watch* I think we should get going..._

_Callie - yeah we should._

Both off them together cleaned the dishes & then set out to leave. As they were about to get out, suddenly it hit Callie what exactly they have done. They again failed to be honest around each other; they again skipped the real communication. Arizona was about to open the door when Callie called her out.

_Callie - I was awake _

*_Arizona smiled to herself & turned around*_

_Callie - I was awake all the time. I was awake when you kissed me...lord that was heaven...I was awake when your lips were merely a breath away from mine and I thought you would kiss me but you just give me a peck...like damn you *Callie was fumbling with words & blurting out* . I was awake...I was awake when you got out of our room with those damp hairs & all I wanted to do was ran my fingers through it...God I never wanted to kiss you so badly...I_

_Arizona - *eyes going darker* ME NEITHER!_

Before Callie could understand what Arizona was saying, Arizona sprinted forward and crashed her lips on hers. She pulled Callie to a deep passionate kiss; Callie's hands immediately reached Arizona's neck and submerged in the entanglements of her hair. They kissed. They kissed like they have never kissed before. 

↪➡ **Will Arizona complete her session? What exactly was her PTSD? Will Callie be able to forgive Arizona for everything? How much Callie & Arizona will hurt each other before they fall together? Will they fall together or will they fall apart? Is their relationship worth bearing all the pain? **

**Hope you guys enjoyed it. Be sure to tell me your exact thoughts on this. A major fight. A major twist. Stick tight for next chapter. XoXo!**

P.S. For me they both made mistakes. And I don't think I'll be honest to my story line if I point all the blames on one shoulder. I'm totally loving your reviews and encouraging Pms. Keep them coming. For those who are asking, I am from Vancouver, BC. I think that explains the lack American slang and culture (booze & all) plus the mention of snow every now and then.


	3. Chapter 3

Note: All the characters and the story itself are in AU. Well I'm trying my best to stick with originality of characters but they can get a bit overboard and may also go beyond their usual streak. Further I always prefer to tell my story in the form of conversation, like you can see the characters, see their emotions but yet what's inside their mind will stay under wraps.

* * *

- First of all I am honestly very sorry for updating so late. I got caught up in some unavoidable prior commitments. So, I apologize for being so late. Well to make up for the fact, this is a heavy dose: longer than my usual chapters plus I got some surprises for y'all !

* * *

- Secondly, a lot of you guys didn't liked the Meredith/Arizona face off. Well lets just say that it has something to do with my story line plus I honestly didn't want to overlook Callie's sufferings.

* * *

**Crazy Ever After – Chapter 3**

**At the Park - **

It has stopped snowing. Callie & Arizona sit beside each other in silence on their fav bench in the park. The view has always been ecstatic. Lush Seattle spread all in front of their eyes; covered in snow, as far as their eyes can go, its all snow. Callie steeled a look behind to the far end of the park; Sofia was playing joyfully with Zola. Meredith & Cristina keeping an eye on the girls and keeping them entertained. She loves this place, just on the left side of their apartment building, filled with all kinds of trees and lush green grass. It's always peaceful here. She & Arizona used to come here whenever they have free time. Many important decisions about their life has been made on this bench only. Callie looked at Arizona who was lost in some deep thoughts & then again looked behind. Cristina has kneeled down on all fours and Zola & Sofia are taking turns in riding on her back. God! She's so good around kids; Callie wondered why Cristina never agreed to have kids of her own. Her gaze again settled on Arizona. Someone, who at some point in her life didn't wanted kids, but now she can't live without Sofia. Does she still feel the same way about her? Her love changed Arizona, made her see happiness in a family. Can her love still make Arizona realise that their happiness lies in being together. Callie was still lost in thought, looking at Arizona, when as always Arizona sensed her stare. She turned to face her, her blue eyes locking on the chocolate ones of her own.

_Arizona - Callie!_

_Callie - Umm hmmmm!_

_Arizona - Callie! *putting her hand on Callie's, breaking her daze*_

_Callie - What?_

_Arizona - *looking into Callie's eyes for a long time* What if we?_

_Callie - *putting her hands over Arizona's* we will be fine Arizona. You & me. We will be fine. Whatever went wrong...I don't wanna look back. I'll fix it. I'll fix everything. Everything will be fine._

_Arizona - *tears starting to make a appearance on her eyelashes* we can't just move forward without burying the past Callie...I...It'll..._

_Callie - *taking hold of both of Arizona's hand* so we will bury it together...I'll fix everything. I promise._

Arizona could feel Callie's pain but the pain she's feeling was overwhelming. She knows what Callie is saying is out of concern & need to make their relationship work. But at the same time, each word from her mouth was daggering her heart. Does she really need to be fixed? Isn't she enough for Callie the way she is?

_Arizona - *standing up* I gotta go. I'll see you at later?_

_Callie - *standing up* Yeah sure thing. I'll drop Sofia at daycare. You go ahead._

Arizona turns on her feet to make her way towards her car & then immediately Callie calls her out. She turns around, her eyes instantly locking on Callie's.

_Callie - whatever you choose about showing up *indicating the session*...I'll support it. _

_Arizona - *with a faint smile* I know._

_Callie - And I'll be right here. Which ever way this day goes...at the end of it, no matter what happens, I'll wait here for you. I don't have many surgeries scheduled today, so incase I say other wise *pointing the bench* you'll find me right there at 8 pm._

_Arizona - *wiping away the tears* I'm gonna count on that._

_Callie - *waving* you should.  
_

* * *

**At the hospital -**

It was around 11 am when Arizona made her way to the NICU after finishing a couple of minor surgeries. Somehow, holding a scalpel, standing on a OR table, having full control on everything around her has been always calming to her. It makes her confident in herself knowing that she's not just wanted but needed. Her mind was still wandering on one thought. Whether she should go to the session or not. Clearly Callie wants her to, but she knows Callie will understand if she doesn't shows up. They can always talk privately right? Oh snap! When was that have ever been easy?

She was checking on her patient's chart when she saw April making her way towards her. Anger & rage filled her immediately. She was sure her face was showing all the signs of disgust but still April it didn't stopped April's approach.

April knew that NICU is the best place in the hospital to corner Arizona. Something about being around all the tiny humans always keeps her friend calm. Plus she was not ready to give up. Not after coming this far. Arizona's face had its typical 'don't you dare' look but still April proceeded.

_April - Come on yell at me! *Arizona doesn't react* Go ahead! Oh now you can't even look at me? *no reaction* Arizona! Please just listen to me once..._

_Arizona - Dr. Kepner. *April protests* _what_ brings you here? Looking out for somebody?_

_April - *with desperation* Arizonaaa Please!_

_Arizona - *flatly* Etiquettes Dr. Kepner. You're talking to the chief of this department..._

_April - Oh really! So have you seen Arizona? The one who cried on this shoulder? Vented her heart out? Who was in pit dark, unless I pulled her out ... Have you seen her?_

_Arizona - *pocketing her hands in her lab coat & finally facing April* She did that cause she thought you're her friend._

_April - *folding her arms* and I did what I did because she's my friend._

_Arizona - You betrayed her. She trusted you with her feelings but you...you cashed on her miseries..._

_April - *shutting Arizona* you really think its about the project or the funding Arizona? You really think if I was even a bit concerned about that than I would jeopardize that? *Arizona goes silent* ... I pulled that for you. Cause I care for you and as your friend..._

_Arizona - *shutting April* I did not gave you any consent to barge in my personal life April. I did not give you any rights to show everyone how miserable I am..._

_April - * desperately * Ask anybody! No one thinks you're miserable Arizona. In fact they now know that you're a fighter... *seeing that Arizona us absorbing*... You... you were drowning Arizona, holding it all to yourself ...you..._

_Arizona - *desperately* I vented to you April! I didn't let myself drown...I didn't held everything to myself...I shared it with you...I..._

_April - And I am not the only person who needed to know all this. The misconception everyone had for you has to be dissolved. *holding Arizona's hand*... Come to complete your session at 2pm...Please...if not for me...not for anyone...then for Callie..._

_Arizona - *snatching her hand* I can tell her everything whenever I want. I don't need you. *making her way out* and I don't care what anybody else thinks of me..._

_April - *following Arizona to elevator* When was the last time you guys were able to just talk it out? The walls you guys have around each other needs an outside push..._

_*Arizona enters the elevator as April stays out*_

_April - Callie & you have a weakness! *seeing the change in Arizona's expressions* you guys can't see each other in pain. So whenever one lets her pain out the other one gets overwhelmed & does everything to stop it. Even if it means to bolt the pain inside. *seeing that its sinking in Arizona's head* ...But sometimes you need to let that pain out...to talk...to deal...but with you two...it becomes impossible..._

_*ding* _

As the elevator door closes on April's face, Arizona let herself relax a bit & revisits her conversation with April. Sure April crossed some limits but clearly she did it for her. When will people stop thinking that she's someone who needs help? This thing needs to be stopped. She's not broken, & she's not gonna anyone tell her otherwise.

* * *

Arizona finally made her way to her office. She needs time & peace to think. Gladly there aren't any more surgeries scheduled for her today, which is surprising cause with around 4ft of snow already she expected a lot of patients. And it's still snowing heavily. She looked out of the window, feeble traffic, temporary attempts at clearing the roads; they'll probably stay stuck at the hospital tonight. As of now, Karev & Jo can handle her post ops.

She locked the door, dropped her lab coat, pulled off her scrub pants & shoes & than swiftly removed her prosthetic leg. Keeping it in front of her on the coffee table, she stretched out her legs on it & sat down on the couch locking her gaze on them. She's not disable, she's differently able. There's nothing to be 'fixed'. At the end of the day, this is how she's gonna go to the bed. And the only people who can make her feel alive in being differently able are those who love her when she's like this. She fell apart cause post plane crash she didn't set out to be comfortable in being differently able. She set out to be the roller skater girl she was, she set out to be the old Arizona & that's why she fall on her face. No, there's no way she's gonna let herself feel miserable. She's confident & that's how the world's gonna face her.

* * *

It was 01:30 pm when Callie got out of her last surgery of the day. Somehow Leah assisting her in the procedure didn't tensed the situation, she didn't felt irked or uncomfortable. Maybe it's cause she shouldn't have put so much thought in Leah on the first place. She made her to the attendings lounge to have some lunch. Will Arizona be free? Should she go & check whether they can grab something together? Probably a bad idea, she needs time to think whether she should come to the session or not. Half n hour from now & she'll know whether Arizona will show up or not. Honestly it doesn't make any difference. If Arizona doesn't show up than she'll make sure she makes her talk privately. Maybe at their home, where there wouldn't be any judging eyes. Entering the lounge Callie found April & Meredith deep in argument.

_April - *in disbelief* YOU DID WHAT?_

_Meredith - I did what felt right to me. She's not the only one who suffered._

_April - *sarcastically* yeah but there's a thing called 'right time to do the right thing'!?_

_Meredith - It was right on me. There's no better time than THIS._

_April - *hands on air* for haven's sake do you have any idea about what Arizona's PTSD was?_

_Callie's concentration jumped on Arizona's mention._

_Meredith - *bit confused* No. But I am sure it couldn't have been that serious...I am doctor Kepner. I know what PTSD is. And clearly in Arizona's case it wasn't something cationic or psychic. So stop..._

_Callie - *butting in* whoa whoa whoa what happened? What's with Arizona?_

_April - *eyeing Meredith* Mer gave an earful to Arizona on how she have treated you like crap since the plane crash._

_Callie - *to Mer* YOU DID WHAT?_

_Meredith - now don't you start with me Callie? *eyeing April* I'm not blindsided to just one of you. I have seen enough to..._

_Callie - *throwing hands on air* *to April & Meredith * why can't guys just leave us alone. She thinks she's helping Arizona. You think you're helping. When none of you have any idea what toll it has on us. Everything you guys have done to make it better has actually made it worse. So please. Stop._

_April - *in disbelief* I can't believe you guys. *to Callie* tell me you figured out what she went through on your own. Tell me you didn't learn more about her situation in past 24 hours than the whole 2 weeks since you guys are back. TELL ME YOU LET HER SPEAK..._

_Meredith - *stepping forward* APRIL!_

_April - *backing off* I'm sorry. Okay. I'm sorry. Yeah you're right I am just thinking about Arizona.*Sarcastically* She thinks I am thinking about myself. I don't know why I am jeopardizing MY CAREER for you people. *making her way out* But anyways I am not done. So, I'll be there at counseling room at 2 again to boost 'my career' & I'll like to request the board to show up. *slams door*._

_Callie - *turning to Meredith* what did you say to her?_

_Meredith - why everyone's thinking that she's not my friend? *calming down* If you think she's fragile Callie...than..._

_Callie - She's not fragile. She's strong._

_Meredith - And that's why she can take in & understand whatever I had said. She needs to understand that it's not just the post infidelity thing that was hard on you. Everything since the crash was equally hard on both of you. It wasn't just her trauma. You were equally traumatized._

_Callie - *slipping to couch in desperation* I don't get anything. Why she's so bottled up? I comfort her...I comfort her all the time...& yet she just won't open up...What the hell is she so afraid of?_

_Meredith - *examining her watch* I think it's time to find out. Come on let's go!  
_

* * *

**At the counseling room:**

Meredith & Callie entered the room together. Everyone else have already occupied seat around the oval conference table. Meredith & Callie occupied their seat towards the opposite south end of the table. April was pre occupied in her case files. The tension in the room was visible to everyone.

_Karev - Wow! This room is colder than outside._

_*All of them let out a nervous laugh*_

_Webber - Hmmm how long will it snow? Ge'ez we have 4fts already. Seems like the roads will be fully blocked by the end of the day,_

_Bailey - If we're gonna bunk here, the attendings lounge is mine. _

_Derek - It's better we stay here. *pointing towards the window* this much of snow, it'll be better if we stay here. The patients' inflow will be quite thick._

_Cristina - Well the road has to be cleared first to bring in patients. *laughing* I 'll call it a slow night. _

_Owen - slow night but definitely an early overflowing morning._

_April - surely a lots of trauma._

_Jackson -maybe we should pump the ER supplies. You know stay ready for what comes next?!_

_Callie - maybe we all should just get drunk & curse the Mother Nature for its cruelty & injustice and I don't know...everything._

_*the room goes silent again*_

_Callie - and now I am killing the fun. *laughs*_

All of them join Callie in a throaty laughter. And then Arizona enters the room. Her blue eyes meeting everyone's gaze but locking on just one right there in front of her; the one she fell in love with. The room falls in silence again.

_Arizona - and now I am killing the fun._

The roar of laughter this time turns out to be deafening. Arizona first looks at everyone surprised but later joins them. Finally when none of them could breathe anymore, they stop the laughing.

_April - *standing up* Arizona...err Dr. Robbins. Should we..._

_Arizona - *with faint smile* yeah we should. But I want to do it here..._

_April - *confused*Meaning?_

_Arizona - I wanna do it here. Sitting right here, In front of everyone. There's no need to go behind that glass wall._

Arizona could feel two set of eyes desperately searching her. Callie & April. But she is pulling it all really well. She has decided, she's gonna hide her emotions well. No tears, dead pan. She has to look strong.

_April - you sure? Cause things could get..._

_Arizona - It's the same thing April. Sitting behind a glass wall but knowing that everyone is here watching me isn't gonna make any difference. *taking a seat towards the north end of table, exactly opposite to the Callie*_ Come_ on sit down. We're already late._

_April - *taking a seat besides Arizona* you sure Arizona?_

_Arizona - *smiling* of course! No big deal..._

_April - *looking towards others* so would you be okay with anyone elses opinion or questions?_

_Arizona - *looking at Callie* I'll be okay with everything. It's up to them, whether they wanna be okay with my opinion or not & above all, it's all up to you. Steer it whichever way you want._

Callie was looking straight into the eyes she fell in love with. Trying to read any signals of ambivalence but the blue eyes were betraying her. No. This is not gonna be like the other sessions. Arizona is not gonna open up the way she did previously. April needs to pull on a good effort or all of this will go in vain. She has to twist Arizona in words to get the correct answers, the right emotions. This is gonna be tough.

_April - *flipping pages* okay I'll make it quick. There's not that much left to be covered... Okay Dr. Arizona Robbins, we're starting now. Just make sure you're answering only me._

_Arizona - positive!_

_April - so...umm...okay from where we left off, so finally, one major question. What triggers your PTSD?_

_Arizona - *flatly* my insecurities._

_April - and what were or are you so insecure about?_

_Arizona - I'm afraid of loss & that's what makes me insecure._

_April - you're afraid of what kind of loss?_

_Arizona - I'm afraid of death._

_April - *taken aback* that's what you are afraid about? We all are afraid of death. How come it triggers PTSD in you?_

_Arizona - well if you remember, I fell from the sky. One minute I was happy to be alive & next I was in a plane crash. Quite a close encounter with death, obviously it scares me more than anyone._

_April - *in disbelief* but it's contradictory to what you said earlier._

_Arizona - there were a lot of things I told you in that room *pointing the glass wall* that I didn't told you earlier..._

_April - But I knew them. This is not even close to what you stated._

_Arizona - *leaning in* so how about you read out everything I told you earlier & we end this here & all._

April was literally taken aback. This is not how she expected the most important part of the session to turn out to be. She looked towards Callie, whose eyes were also scrutinized over Arizona & then suddenly Callie looked towards her. She nodded affirming that Arizona is bottled up again and is pulling on a well executed act. She has to approach her differently. She looked up to Callie again, who nodded again affirming that she allows her to approach Arizona whichever way possible.

_April - okay...relax. Statements can change. There's nothing wrong in that. So, as you said, you were afraid of death._

_Arizona - yes!_

_April - anything else?_

_Arizona - nope_

_April - you up for a Rapid fire?_

_Arizona - *judging for a moment* hmmm...okay_

_April - okay. Here we go. You were in a plane crash._

_Arizona - yes_

_April - you thought you will die._

_Arizona - yes_

_April - but you survived._

_Arizona - yes_

_April - back in the woods. How was it?_

_Arizona - duh? Hard...very hard._

_April - how hard?_

_Arizona - I explained it earlier also. It was one of the darkest periods of my life._

_April - How dark?_

_Arizona - *fumbling* that whole week...those days...it was like dying everyday._

April knew this her only shot.

_April - you wanted to die?_

_Arizona - YES!_

Arizona cursed herself the moment that 'yes' left her mouth. She could clearly see the triumph on April's face. Damn it!

_April - if once dying was easier for you than living, than how come you are afraid of death? *Arizona went speechless*_

_Derek - *calmly* we're surgeons Arizona. We see death everyday. We're never ever afraid of it. We beat death._

_April - *looking at Arizona's flushed face* moving on or rather I would like to say, starting again. What are you so insecure about? _

_Arizona - *looking down* loss. I'm afraid of loss._

_April - *rolling her eyes* okay! What kind of loss?_

_Arizona - *in a low voice* Love_

_April - *smiling & settling back* care to explain?_

_Arizona - I'm afraid. I'm afraid all the time that I'll lose the people I love. That...that this universe will take away everything from me if I don't fight for it._

_April - why do you think this universe will take away everything from you? What kind of thinking is this?_

_ Arizona - *fumbling* Cause... Cause it happened so many times, Tim, Nick, my...my baby & than at one point...even my family._

_April - so your fear for losing the people you love triggered your PTSD?_

_Arizona - yes. _

_April - I remember we chalked out together how it affected your decisions. Please explain it to everyone._

_Arizona - *facing everyone but avoiding eye contact with anyone* My PTSD involved internalization. I used to presume things. Draw scenarios that only makes sense in my head. Draw out nonsense meanings from a simple conversation. Which eventually led to my misjudging of many situations...err mis read many intentions...I..._

_April - Go back to the first time you misread an intention or situation._

_Arizona - Err... It was during Bailey's wedding. I... I knew Callie was a bit bothered with my constant whining about the leg... & then she kind of mentioned the...the lack of Spontaneity in our marriage... *Callie's face fell open* and then...then she told me...how she suggested Bailey to runaway... And I kind of just thought that she...she...you know for the lack of Spontaneity...would also run away...that I might lose her?_

Callie's mind wandered to Ben & Bailey's wedding where she had jokingly told Arizona & Meredith that _"marriage is a dance with death and leaving him at the altar would be painful but efficient way out". _Of course she was just joking. And then she remembered how Arizona desperately made an attempt to bring back the Spontaneity in their relationship & how later she asked her to not run away. Her eyes again found the blue ones & they tried to say that she never meant it.

_April -_ _It was all in your head._

_Arizona - Yeah...it was all in my head. I drew out scenarios..._

_April - & how did this affected in the long run?_

_Arizona - I became obsessed with the idea that I'll loose Callie if I don't make her happy. So, I like mentioned earlier, started hiding away my pain from her..._

_April - and it happened all the time. Your insecurities triggered PTSD & you kept on presuming scenarios. You internalised everything..._

_Arizona - yes. That's exactly what happened. That's probably what eventually took a toll on our relationship._

_April - the bottom line is *looking towards Callie * your biggest insecurity have always been that you'll loose Callie._

Callie was suddenly taken aback with flashbacks of their life dancing in front of her eyes. _"Don't ever leave", "please don't run", "I can't loose you". _She looked towards Arizona who was making an attempt to avoid her gaze. Yes. This is what she is afraid of. That she'll loose her. She strained her gaze again & finally the blue ones met hers. Callie tried to read them, the hint of glitter, the remorse, the hurt, the angst? Wait! Those eyes are saying something. And then Callie is again taken aback to what happened post infidelity, _"apparently I lost you", "So I am not gonna go in that room with you", "I need my apartment back, I need me back", "You know what we're not doing this, you take her"._

Arizona's eyes were clearly reminding her of all the time she walked away from her. She is clearly reminding Callie how much she hurt her. Callie let out a breath in disbelief. Is Arizona really doing this? Reminding her of what she did when she literally flayed her heart apart? She couldn't believe her eyes.

_April - *closing the file* I think we're done here. The board can discuss & announce a verdict on this PTSD unit opening decision at an amicable time...thank y..._

_Callie - *raising her voice & looking straight at Arizona* what would you have done?_

_Arizona - *taken aback* excuse me?_

_Callie - *leaning forward* what. Would. You. Have. Done ? If i would have cheated on you?_

In an instant the room fell silent. Arizona couldn't believe her ears. What ? Is Callie really asking her that? In front of everyone? She looked towards everyone in disbelief, hoping someone will change the topic. But every head was hung low. She looked towards Callie, searching, if she really meant what she's saying. Yes. She really wants to know that. Why in front of everyone? Okay if she needs an answer, she'll get the truth.

_Arizona - *settling back* *calmly * Oh that's easy. I would have killed you._

All of them let out a nervous laugh except Callie who stared in disbelief.

_Callie - *pissed off* huh? Really!_

_Arizona - *still calm* absolutely!_

_Callie - *standing up, kicking her chair behind* you would rather die than have a chance to be happy with me?_

_Arizona - *standing up & crossing the room* yes! Positively... I..._

_Callie - *closing the distance between them & facing Arizona* and still you claim that loosing me was your biggest insecurity? *raising voice* you are choosing death over second chance... And... Still you are claiming that you are afraid of loosing me. Huh?_

_Arizona - *folding her arms* lemme put it in this way. Yes. Yes I'll choose to die than spend miserable nights away from you. Yes. I'll choose to die than get separated from you. *raising voice* Yes, I'll choose to die than be the person who ends up destroying her own family. Yes I'll choose to die than be away from you. Yes I'll choose to die than be the person who destroyed you Callie. Who destroyed your faith in love, which destroyed our relationship? Yes. Yes. Yes. *screaming* yes I'll choose to die than be the person who cheats on YOU._

Arizona was shaking. She could see Callie still fuming. She looked towards everyone, no one was on sitting, all of them were on their feets, looking towards both of them; absorbing each and every word. She had made her point. She looked towards Callie again.

_Callie - I can't believe you. You...you are saying my second chance means nothing to you? *making her way out* I... Can't fucking believe you..._

_Arizona - *taken aback* that's...that's not what I meant...st ...stop_

Before Arizona could stop Callie, Callie stormed out of the room banging the door loud. Few tensed moments passed.

_Derek - I think we are done here. It's... It's 7 pm. Time to get back to work..._

_Meredith - or leave_

_April - leave? In this weather?_

_Jackson - okay people! As the chair person, i would like to thank y'all for your time & efforts. We will discuss on verdict tomorrow..._

_Karev - I'm out._

Everyone nodded in affirmation and made their way out. April stayed back with Arizona.

_April - let her rationalize _

_Arizona - what?_

_April - It's a lot to take in. Let her rationalize everything..._

_Arizona - *holding her head* she probably hates me now..._

_April - *sensing the discomfort* you know I have white wine & probably some vodka hidden in my locker..._

_Arizona - *smiling* yeah...how about some strong black coffee?_

_April - sounds good to me. We're in hospital...probably we should stay sober..._

They both burst out laughing, Stopping only after their stomach gave up. And then Arizona pulled April in a warm bear hug.

_Arizona - thank you. I don't know where me & Callie stand after this but still thank you for everything...thank you _

_April - *patting Arizona's back* it's okay. Everything will be okay.  
_

* * *

**At Arizona's office:**

After handling their post ops to the interns & residents, April & Arizona retired in Arizona's office. Keeping a company with Coffee & Bagel; Talking for hours about how screwed up their love life is; discussing the snow storm that has now permanently blocked all roads, shutting the traffic to zero and how once the snow fall stops & roads get cleared, they'll drown with inflow of trauma, April & Arizona spent the rest of their night just like that. At around 10 pm, when they were deep in discussion, Meredith barged in.

_Meredith - *looking straight at Arizona after surveying the room* WHERE'S CALLIE?_

_Arizona - *sitting straight up* Wha...What do you mean?_

_Meredith - WHERE THE HELL IS CALLIE?_

One look on Meredith's face & April & Arizona bolted up, knowing something's wrong. Arizona could feel the hair on the back of her neck standing up; heat rushing out through her ears; Goosebumps all over.

_Arizona - *stepping forward* what do you mean by where is she?_

_April - Isn't she is with you guys?_

_Meredith - *confused* with us? No? She...wasn't with us. She wasn't here?_

_Arizona - No!_

_Meredith - We were all in the attendings lounge for I don't know till 9 pm and then everyone retired for some rest...Callie wasn't with us. I presumed she's at the daycare with girls or with you...But when I went there She wasn't there...I...*in fear* I have been calling her... & paging her for past hour...Sofia...Sofia is uncomfortable or something...*gasping* but Callie never answered...& then I thought you two are here...so..._

_Arizona - *slumping to the table* I...I presumed she's at daycare...April...April told me to give her some alone time...that's...that's why I didn't went to the daycare...Oh my god._

_April - ok. Calm down people. Maybe she's somewhere else in the hospital...you know with patients?_

_Meredith - I checked everywhere. I called every department. She's not any where. _

_April - *seeing Arizona grasping* Okay Okay. Think. We need to think. *Kneeling in front of Arizona* YOU need to think...think where she might be..._

Arizona could feel her head spinning. A million thoughts making their way to her mind at lightening speed. She held her head hoping to clearly think. She could feel the tears threatening to slip from her eyes. Where is Callie? She...She left her? No! That's not possible? Where is she? How could she bail on her? Stop! That's not possible. Is she okay? Where is she? She closed her eyes; shutting down every horrible possibility; taking deep breaths. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. And then she saw Callie, the chocolate-brown eyes staring at her, the super smile plastered on her face, she's saying something, Arizona concentrated on the faint sound of Callie's voice _"And I'll be right here. Which ever way this day goes...at the end of it, no matter what happens, I'll wait here for you. I don't have many surgeries scheduled today, so incase I say otherwise, **you will find me right there at 8pm**"_

Arizona bolted up in horror as the realisation hit her, holding her mouth, she looked towards Meredith & Arizona. Tears already rolling down her face, bile willing to make a appearance, she couldn't believe this is happening.

_Arizona - THE PARK_

_April - What?_

_Arizona - She's at the park!_

_Meredith - are you kidding me? She's at the Park? In this weather?_

_Arizona - *babbling* She...she promised me...she'll be there..._

_April - *calmly* Arizonaaa! Relax! She can't be at the park. It's like 6 blocks away from here...the roads are kind of blocked with 10ft snow walls...She can't drive there..._

_Arizona - *in horror* She didn't drive her... way...there..._

_Meredith - *finally realizing* SHE WALKED HER WAY THERE?!_

_April - *confused* in a freaking snow storm?_

_Arizona - *holding her head* She's...She's keeping her promise._

As the gravity of situation settles in, all three of them stare at one another in horror. After few tense minutes passed, Arizona wipes away her tears and starts making her way out.

_April - Where are you going?_

_Arizona - *snapping* my life is slipping out of my hands. Don't ask me where I am going..._

One look on Arizona's face and Meredith & April knew that they can't talk her out of this.

_April - fine. I'll go with you._

_Meredith - me too._

_Arizona - *in disbelief* No. No. I can't risk taking both of you out in snow...I..._

_April - *closing her arms* I. Am. Going. Just give me a minute...I'll fetch some supplies._

_Arizona - *seeing that Mer is about to say the something* you stay here. Take care of Sofia...please._

_Meredith - *retracting* okay. Okay. But you should take someone else with you...we...we don't know what you'll be walking into...*looking towards April* Call Jackson. Take him with you. Take whatever you can carry on a backpack.  
_

* * *

Within half an hour, Arizona, April & Jackson were ready to leave. They were all heavily dressed; loaded with all essential supplies; holding canes to support their walking in the snow, they wasted no time in heading out for park. The wind was painfully cold, snow snearing into exposed part of their faces, darkness and snow making visibility cloudy, each step they took was taking a full body effort and a full one minute. Arizona was walking faster than April & Jackson, leaving them a few paces behind

_Jackson - *wiping snow from his goggles* How the hell Torres walked through this?_

_April - *pointing towards Arizona* the way she's walking through this...come on walk faster..._

_Jackson - yeah she got a plastic leg...must be easier to lift & thump that foot down..._

_April - Keep walking!_

_Jackson - you are fooling yourself._

_April - excuse me?!_

_Jackson - Say you find Callie...I don't think you'll find her though...not at the park for sure...but say you do. Do you think you can drag her 'must be frozen' body to the hospital?_

_April - *snapping* we will do our best. We will find her & we will do our best to save her._

Crossing their apartment, Arizona made her way to the park. Probably took an hour to cover a 15 minutes distance. She could hear Jackson & April's conversation but her mind is set on only one goal - Callie. She could feel new sensations of pain at the stump of her left leg. But nothing can stop her. She knew she can't stop. She's one hundred percent sure Callie is on the bench. As she entered the park, the view took her breath away. Illuminated with lamp posts, anywhere Arizona turned, it was snow. Though the park is dense with shrubs and grasses, but she could see none. It's like no greenery ever existed here. The only hopeful sight was the tall maple trees, covered with snow, but still visible, the ground beneath them scarcely covered with white. The sight gave her some hope, cause their fav bench is also beneath an old densely leaved maple tree. This sudden hope gave more strength to her flight & she started taking longer strides towards the bench, towards Callie.

* * *

Callie could feel nothing. She cursed the moment she decided to come out in such a bad weather. She should have just called or texted Arizona that with the snow fall and all, they can't meet out here in the park. Bringing out her hand from her fur coat, she examined the watch. Wait it's still 9 pm? Wasn't it was 9 pm the last time she checked the watch. Cursing herself, she pocketed her hands pulling the coat closer around her. It's so cold. She could feel the tiny drops of snow falling on her head, even through her fur cap. She looked up; the maple tree is already heavily laden with snow that can come down all in a thump. Fearing the worst she scooted towards the far end of the bench. She could see her knees trembling. Maybe it was a bad idea. The walk down here was awfully cold and painful, there's no way she would go back to the hospital, and maybe she should just go to the cosyness of their apartment. Yeah that sounds like a good idea. She tried to pull herself to leave but she couldn't. What the hell? She patted her legs, they were numb, and she couldn't feel anything. Damn it! She tried again but no luck. Then she heard something that made her hair rise. She looked up & in a split second saw a blanket of snow coming down on her. Thump!

Oh damn! She tried to open her eyes. Oh at least they are fine. But why is it so dark? Where the hell is Arizona? She made herself sit on the bench again. Thank God the legs are not numb anymore. But why is it so dark? Then she saw her, those blue eyes, and those dimples waving at her from a far distance. Callie's heart swelled at the sight. Arizona! But wait! Why she bought Sofia down? And why are they just smiling giddily & playing and not coming to her? She's so going to make Arizona pay for coming so late. She pulled out her hands from her fur coat and examined her watch. What then? It's still 9 pm? How? She looked towards Arizona and Sofia again. Why is it so dark here but bright and sunshiny there? Perhaps she should just gulp on her stubbornness and go to them. She pulled herself to leave but she couldn't. What the hell? She patted her legs, they were numb, and she couldn't feel anything. Damn it! She looked towards Arizona again and waved at her. At least her hands are not numb. But then she heard something that made her hair rise. She looked up & in a split second saw a blanket of snow coming down on her.

Thump!

* * *

**AT THE PARK -**

Arizona looked around in desperation, Callie's nowhere in sight. The bench is empty. But she could feel her. Where the hell is she?

_Jackson - told you she won't come here...not in this weather._

_April - *flashing torch-light around* will you just shut up & look around..._

_Jackson - no why on earth a grown ass woman would will sit here till midnight?_

_April - keep looking._

Arizona could still feel Callie's vibes around the bench. She's here. Or she was here. She screamed her name but it got muffled in the gusty wind. _"She looked towards Arizona again and waved at her". _There. Arizona saw some moments just below the bench. She's sure she saw something moving. She scooted down. And then a gloved hand appeared out of the snow, moving in to & fro motion, like waving at her. She held that hand & immediately screamed Callie's name in a voice that brought down Jackson & April around her.

April registered the situation in a second. Callie is buried under a think blanket of snow. Together the three of them scooted off all the snow & pulled Callie's limp body to the bench. The sight was definitely terrifying. Callie was blue, like frozen. April looked towards Jackson who nodded affirming her thoughts & then towards Arizona who was making a desperate attempt to revive Callie.

_Arizona - *pinning her ear to Callie's chest* FEEBEL HEARTBEATS. I'M STARTING CPR_

_April - ARIZONAAAA! We..._

_Jackson - *checking Callie's pulse* Dr. Robbins...she's..._

_Arizona - NO. I CAN HEAR THE HEART BEATS. SHE'S...SHE'S FINE...WE..._

_April - *cutting Arizona off* Yes. Okay. But we can't do anything here. *looking towards Callie* she's...numb... We need to get her outta here..._

_Jackson - We can't drag her to the hospital..., she...she won't survive..._

_Arizona - *Shutting Jackson* we ...we will take her to our apartment. *thinking quickly* Come on...gimme a hand._

_Jackson - *mumbling* How's that going to help?_

_April - you wanna stay here and freeze to death or you wanna take Callie to some place where it's warm.  
_

* * *

**AT THE APARTMENT -**_  
_

With the help of Jackson, April & Arizona half lifted, half dragged Callie to their apartment. Arizona could feel the hardened in cold clothes on Callie's body. As soon as they entered their apartment, all of them expertly started working on Callie. Jackson set out the humidifier & room heater, turned on the radio for update on weather & then went to kitchen to warm up some water. April & Arizona worked expertly, removing Callie's clothes, tucking her under couple of blankets from head to toe. April used the portable ultrasound for any kind of internal bleeding. Arizona was right, Callie's heart is still beating but very feebly and her pulse rate is also low. When Jackson came back with steaming hot water, they first dipped Callie's hands & toes to save them from frost bite. With the sudden change of temperature, few rashes on Callie's body are now visible.

_Jackson - It's not gonna work._

_Arizona - *looking up to Jackson * what do you mean?_

_April - *realising what he meant* He means Callie is in cold shock. Her body is numb to any kind of outer warmth. There's no way it all gonna work..._

_Arizona - No. NO! We...we should take her to the hospital...Get her inner metabolism work..._

_Jackson - We can't go to the hospital. She's hypothermic. We take her out again, we kill her._

_April - Jackson's right. She's...she's detoriating...her heart rate is low, her respiratory system is slow, and her BP is dropping...slowly her organs will start shutting down... Arizona there's nothing we can do._

_Arizona - SHUT UP. SHUT THE HELL UP. WHAT KINDA TRAUMA SURGEON ARE YOU? GIVING UP ON A STILL ALIVE PATIENT? *looking towards Callie & cupping her face* Callie...you wake up...you...you stay alive. You stay alive for me...fight for me...please don't...DO NOT die on me *tears rolling down*... I can't... I can't live without you. Sofia can't live without you...we...we have a future to plan together._

April looked towards Arizona, thinking really hard for a way to save Callie's life. She could see Arizona struggling with her emotions, Jackson deep in thought for a way out. How can they save Callie? Arizona is right, no they can't give up on Callie. The ultrasound showed all her organs are still viable. It's the kinked up metabolic rate that's making her condition worse. The room is now way above room temperature, but that's not gonna work. Callie needs warmth from inside, something that'll warm up her blood and give a push to her metabolism, to her heart rate. Something that'll revive her body in an instant. And just then an idea crossed her mind.

_April - *blurting out* WE CAN SAVE HER_

_Arizona - *wiping her tears* HOW?_

_April - *pointing towards Arizona* you can save her. This is it. You. Can. Save. Her. You can do it Arizona. Callie doesn't need a doctor._

_Jackson - wait what?_

_April - *looking towards the confused face of Jackson & Arizona* Callie doesn't needs a doctor Arizona. She needs a wife._

Arizona & Jackson stared at April in utter confusion but then eventually it dawned on them what April means.

_Jackson - *looking towards Arizona* yeah that can work. Err...umm you two discuss what to do...I...I...I'll go *going out* & inform others about our whereabouts._

_April - *turning to Arizona* Arizonaaa_

_Arizona - NO. No...we haven't...we have'nt been there yet..._

_April - *in frustration* okay A we don't have time to think or have a long ass discussion on this. B, right now it's our only option. C, I can try if you let me but Callie might not react to my touch. She. Needs. You. Arizona..._

_Arizona - *thinking hard* She'll never forgive me..._

_April - we're not doing this Arizona...we don't have time to discuss what she'll think or what you think or what will happen...you wanna save her life...you gotta warm her up_

April could sense Arizona's ambivalence. Arizona was on the bed side still looking towards Callie, holding her hand, probably weighing in her options. April moved towards her, she knows right now they don't have any other option.

_April - *keeping her hand on Arizona's shoulder* She sat for hours in snow waiting just for you...she deserves this._

_Arizona - *crying* It's not about her, it's about me. I don't deserve her._

_April - okay she most probably won't even remember what happened..._

_Arizona - *looking towards April* you sure about that?_

_April - quite sure. So...are you gonna..._

_Arizona - *faintly* yeah..._

_April - *shyly* so...err...We wait outside?_

_Arizona - *reaching the bedside drawer* No. Here...take this...*giving the keys* these are of Mark's apartment. You guys can crash there._

_April - that's cool. *starts leaving the room* *Arizona looks up* you are not doing anything wrong. She's your wife. You guys are married. Don't think anything otherwise... *goes out*_

After seeing off April & Jackson to Mark's apartment, Arizona returned to their bedroom. She looked at Callie, who was still lying lifelessly on their bed. If she gotta do this, she gotta do this soon. She doesn't care if saving Callie's life puts their relationship on stake. She'll do anything to save her. She moved closer to the bed, dimming the lights of the room, she quickly changed into her night-gown. The radio was still blazing with the same weather reports; she flicked it to a different station which was playing romantic numbers. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she looked towards Callie again. Will Callie remember their consummation? Does she want Callie to remember it? Or does she want her to remember nothing about it? Will Callie forgive her for this? Removing her prosthetic leg, Arizona lie next to Callie & stared at the dark ceiling for while, letting the music calm down her senses. No. She does not have this much time. She needs to act soon.

Ever since they got back, hoping against all the reality, of course Arizona had many dreams about their union but none of them involved this scenario. She shutted her mind & just listened to her heart. Yeah that's better. Sitting up, she removed her gown and slipped under the blanket, her arms brushing closely with Callie's arms, her warmth absorbing the coldness. The track that was playing on the radio was one of her favorites.

**I'm here again**

**A thousand miles away from you**

**A broken mess, just scattered pieces of who I am**

She scooted herself on one elbow and looked towards Callie again, a tear slipped her eyes as she leaned closer to her ear & whispered something.

**I tried so hard**

**Thought I could do this on my own**

**I've lost so much along the way**

Finally, gathering herself, Arizona cupped Callie's face, meeting it's coldness with the warmth of her hands

**Then I see your face**

**I know I'm finally yours**

**I find everything I thought I lost before**

As love and pent-up desire took over, Arizona leaned and melted her lips to Callie's, capturing the bottom lips, seeking entrance, she deepened her kiss. She could feel Callie's lips not at all responding but still she deepened her kiss more.

**You call my name**

**I come to you in pieces**

**So you can make me whole...**

Melting more into the kiss, Arizona snaked up to Callie's body, her body melting into Callie's curves so perfectly, giving away all the warmth she could, she took Callie's left hand & bought it out of the blanket, slamming it sideways. She closed her fingers, pressing her palm hard. Callie's fingers stayed open in non response.

**I've come undone**

**But you make sense of who I am**

**Like puzzle pieces in your hand,**

Deepening the kiss, putting the pressure on left hand, grinding into Callie's body in full length, Arizona slowly moved her right hand downwards. She could feel warmth collecting between her own legs. Damn! Callie doesn't even need to do anything to make her wet. Finally, grasping for air, she pulled up and looked towards Callie's face. Looking deeply, she then touched Callie's core, sliding her fingers, separating the lips. There. Is that flinch she noticed?

**Then I see your face**

**I know I'm finally yours**

**I find everything I thought I lost before...**

Concentrating on Callie's face, Arizona continued massaging the cilt. She could feel her own orgasm approaching. And then suddenly she sensed Callie's fingers closing over hers. Arizona's head snapped towards their left hands, which are now clamped. A smile crossed her face. Yes. Callie is responding. She plastered another kiss and this time Callie received her. She hadn't opened her eyes yet but Arizona could feel Callie responding to her touch. Then her own release made her fluid and she pulled from the kiss & borrowed her face in Callie's hair. Finally when she could breathe evenly, Arizona entered into Callie with two fingers. She could feel Callie's clamp on her left hand going stronger in response. She kept her own lips glued to Callie's neck. With every thrust, she could feel Callie warming up. She was already in sweat, but as her thrusts went deeper, she saw the first beads of sweats collecting on Callie's neck.

**You call my name**

**I come to you in pieces**

**So you can make me whole!**

Arizona kept on going deeper inside Callie, reaching and hitting the core spot again & again. She could feel Callie's right hand moving and holding on to her body, her left hand still melted in hers. Both their bodies were in sweat already. And then Arizona felt it, the walls of Callie's core spasming around her fingers...

**I tried so hard! So hard!**

**I tried so hard...**

Finally in one last weak moment, Arizona felt Callie's release on her fingers. She collapsed with her own orgasm, melting into Callie's body. She could feel her own body whimpering in loss and then she felt Callie's arms closing around her, holding her or holding onto her. She doesn't know. She just knows that she has finally come home.

**Then I see your face**

**I know I'm finally yours**

**I find everything I thought I lost before...**

**You call my name**

**I come to you in pieces**

**So you can make me whole**

**So you can make me whole...**

Arizona doesn't know for how long they lay their holding on to each other, to their dear life. She could feel Callie's heart beating fast & sound against her own. Callie's fine. That's all what matters. Holding on to one final hope she lifted her head and looked towards Callie. A tear slipped her eye as she saw Callie's eye, still closed, unaware of what just happened. The second track that has just started playing made her more emotional.

**What would I do without your smart mouth?**

**Drawing me in, and you kicking me out**

**You've got my head spinning, no kidding, I can't pin you down...**

Pulling herself together, Arizona scooted herself up and started moving towards the edge of the bed to grab her night-gown. She has just reached the end, when she felt a strong grip around her left wrist. In a split second, Callie dragged her back and pinned her beneath her. A gasp left Arizona's mouth as she stared into the dark eyes pinned to hers.

**What's going on in that beautiful mind**

**I'm on your magical mystery ride**

**And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me, but I'll be alright...**

Arizona stared into Callie's eyes. Trying her level best to read them; she hasn't ever seen Callie's eyes this dark in her whole lifetime. Is it desire? No. It's more than that. It's not just desire, it's passion, it's anger, it's rage, it's hunger. She was still pinned under Callie, both her wrists pinned on the sides of her body in strong firm grip of Callie's hands. She stared into those eyes again, but they were growing more darker. Before Arizona could open her mouth to say anything, Callie claimed them.

**My head's under water**

**But I'm breathing fine**

**You're crazy and I'm out of my mind**

**'Cause all of me**

**Loves all of you**

**Love your curves and all your edges**

**All your perfect imperfections**

**Give your all to me**

**I'll give my all to you**

**You're my end and my beginning**

**Even when I lose I'm winning!**

** 'Cause I give you all of me**

** And you give me all of you, oh**

The kiss was full of every emotion Arizona read in Callie's eyes. Not like the usual gentle or passionate kisses that are Callie's trademark, Callie was'nt just kissing her, she was entering her soul.

**How many times do I have to tell you**

**Even when you're crying you're beautiful too**

**The world is beating you down, I'm around through every mood**

**You're my downfall, you're my muse**

**My worst distraction, my rhythm and blues**

**I can't stop singing; it's ringing, in my head for you**

Once Callie undid her with the kiss, Arizona felt Callie's hands loosening its grip on her wrists and making its way to her core. Grasping for air they pulled apart and Arizona saw Callie burrowing her head in her collar-bone.

**My head's under water**

**But I'm breathing fine**

**You're crazy and I'm out of my mind**

**'Cause all of me**

**Loves all of you**

**Love your curves and all your edges**

**All your perfect imperfections**

**Give your all to me**

**I'll give my all to you**

**You're my end and my beginning**

**Even when I lose I'm winning**

**'Cause I give you all of me**

**And you give me all of you, oh**

Arizona closed her eyes in pain as she felt Callie entering her, her mouth sucking & biting down on her collar-bone. She's ready, ready to give her everything this moment, to Callie. To live this moment to the fullest; to surrender to love.

**Give me all of you**

**Cards on the table, we're both showing hearts**

**Risking it all, though it's hard**

**'Cause all of me**

**Loves all of you**

**Love your curves and all your edges**

**All your perfect imperfections**

**Give your all to me**

**I'll give my all to you**

**You're my end and my beginning**

**Even when I lose I'm winning**

**'Cause I give you all of me**

**And you give me all of you**

**I give you all of me**

**And you give me all of you, ohhhh...**

Callie tried to open her eyes. Oh at least they are fine. But why is it so dark? Where the hell is Arizona? She made herself sit on the bench again. Thank God the legs are not numb anymore. But why is it so dark? And then she saw her, those blue eyes, and those dimples waving at her from a far distance. Callie's heart swelled at the sight. Arizona! She waved back at her. She watched as Arizona reached her in two unbelievable long strides. Their hands met, she could feel the warmth even through the gloves. She looked towards Arizona, her face being the only thing glowing in the dark. But why she's suddenly crying? Callie tried to wipe away her tears but suddenly her hands are numb. She looked down in horror; her whole body is covered in snow making each and every part of her body cold. She looked up again to Arizona but she's not there anymore. What the hell? Where did she go? Callie tried to move, but it's like the ice has plastered her body to the bench. It's so damn cold. She can't breathe, why did Arizona left her in this condition? She looked around, but anywhere her eyes turned it was pitch dark. She could feel sleep taking over her. Yeah one nap and then she'll snap out of this and go home. Just one nap. She rested her head on the bench & falls asleep, for how long she doesn't know but then she heard something. A whisper. Just near her ear. A voice that she can recognise in a heart beat. _"I love you". _Callie snapped open her eyes and turned her head to meet the blue eyes but all she stared into was pitch black darkness. What the hell? She stared ahead into darkness hoping to find someone and finally saw some light. It isn't that far, just few feet away from her. She saw someone lying on the ground? Why is someone taking a nap on a snow bed? She concentrated her gaze & felt Goosebumps as she saw herself lying in front of her. What on earth? Then she saw Arizona, laying next to her shadow self. No Arizona that's not me! Callie tried to move but the ice cast is making it impossible. She stared in desperation as Arizona made love to her shadow self. Rage took over her as she saw Arizona bring pleasure to a body. Whether it's Arizona's hotness or her own rage, she doesn't know but Callie could feel the ice cast melting. Slowly & steadily the whole ice melted away. That's it. Callie stood up, her legs, her hands, her body suddenly working perfectly fine. She moved towards Arizona, reaching there, she felt a pull, a force, a pull strong enough to drag her own self and merge into the body lying beneath Arizona. It's like she entered that body. Callie felt angry. She looked towards Arizona. Why is she leaving? In one swift motion she grabbed Arizona and pinned her to the ground. Wait where did the snow go? Callie looked towards Arizona, feeling lust, love, anger, hunger, desire, passion all at the same time. And before Arizona could say anything, she claimed her. They made love, for how long & how many times she doesn't know, she just know that when they both were exhausted & spent to the last ounce of energy in their body, they cuddled, wrapping each other in a cocoon, shutting the whole world out.

Callie tried to open her eyes. Oh at least they are fine. But why the hell it's so hot here? Why is it so sunshiny...?

Arizona examined herself in the bathroom mirror. A smile crossing her face as she noticed a deep red love bite on her collar-bone. Callie has branded her last night. She has not felt so content in ages. She woke up, wrapped up in Callie's arm this morning. Her body melted into hers, her heart beating against hers. It was like heaven. She never slept till 9am in her entire lifetime but today it was different. Blissful. She looked out of the window, sun blazing bright on her face, a cool humid wind washing over her body; she could see corpse working expertly down below the road clearing the snow. After she woke up, Arizona went out to meet April & Jackson, updating them on Callie's condition, she sent them off to the hospital. They are much-needed there. April has promised her that she'll page her immediately in case of emergency. Till now, she hasn't beeped, neither has Callie. Probably cause all the roads are yet to be cleared fully. Arizona's mind wandered to Callie again. Will she remember anything? About what happened last night? About their union? What if she doesn't? Should she tell her about it? Arizona took a long hot shower, washing her body with a million possibilities, a million hopes, and a million thoughts.

Callie woke up to a warm mushy feeling. Her body feels sore. She lifted her hands but her moments got restrained by a tube attached to her arm. IV fluid? Why? She looked around avoiding the scorching sunlight coming through the windows; of course this is her room. But then why she's attached to an IV fluid bag? Her head suddenly starts throbbing. She closed her eyes hoping that the headache will stop but it got worse. It's like her mind is in puzzle. She started placing the puzzle, hoping to clear her mind. How is she here? She was in the park, sitting in snow, waiting for Arizona but Arizona never came. The last thing she remembers is checking her watch for the last time at 9pm. The rest of puzzle is just a blur and doesn't make any sense. There are blurry visions of her & Arizona kissing passionately. But that's probably one of her those dreams she had been having ever since they got back. There are visions of Arizona's mouth moving in front of her but she can't make out the words. Callie's head felt like it'll explode with these visions. She snapped open her eyes, removed the IV tube and got out of the bed. She found herself cladded in her night-gown. Something's wrong. Her body, it feels like, it has been touched. No, not just her body, it's her soul that has been touched. Shouldn't she be mad about this feeling? But somehow this feeling was warming her heart, making it swell in happiness. It was kind of telling her that this touch could only be of her soul mate. She stood up & regretted her movement in a second. It's exhausting and painful to just even stand up on her feet. She walked a few steps and reached the window, it's not showing anymore, the roads are clear now, but snow is still covering the pavements and side-walk. She reached her pager on the window side table cursing herself for sleeping till so late. What the hell? Not even a single page? Shouldn't her pager be swarming with incoming trauma notifications? Why the hell nothing is making sense? Her stomach growled at the scent of waffles. Arizona! Yes Arizona could help her in clearing her thoughts. Wait. How did she reach here? And why the hell Arizona didn't come to the park last night?

Pulling a protective blanket around her, Callie stepped out of their bedroom and saw Arizona standing in the kitchen. Arizona dressed in her classic black jeans and a collared black shirt. Her hairs still damp from shower; a smile plastered on her face as she continued her work precisely on the egg scramble. Damn she looks hot! Callie approached her noiselessly, her mind wandering with millions of questions, deciding which one she should ask first.

_Callie - heyyy_

_Arizona - *turning around with a smiley face* heyyy you up already...do you want some breakfast? The coffee is ready and I made some waffles...or...or you could wait for a minute and I'll be done with this scrambles._

_Callie - *sensing Arizona's nervousness* ARIZONA!_

Arizona could feel it. The fear she feared the most coming to life. She could feel it. The confusion on Callie's face is affirming her thoughts. She doesn't remember anything. This can't be happening. God please No! She kept down the frying pan and crossed the kitchen counter, coming around to face Callie. She locked her gaze on Callie's eyes, still hoping against the hopes.

_Arizona - *calmly* you must be having a million questions. Ask!_

_Callie - How am I here? I was waiting for you in the park...why didn't you come? _

Callie could see the color draining from Arizona's face.

_Arizona - *patiently* I did. I did go there. I was just late cause I didn't imagine you'll go there in a freaking snow storm for heaven's sake! Not after you were so clearly pissed at me after the session... But when we couldn't find you anywhere, I figured you must have gone to the park. *reading Callie's confusion* you were passed out...literally buried in the snow. Jackson & April helped me to drag you here... WHAT THE HELL YOU WERE THINKING?_

Arizona could see Callie processing her words, trying to fit in the puzzles in her head. She gave a moment to Callie to respond.

_Callie - *in confusion* I... I went there cause I told you I'll be there..._

_Arizona -*pissed* in a snow storm? Who goes out in a snow storm? Do you realize you almost froze to death?_

_Callie - What? Really? I don't remember anything... I died?_

_Arizona - YES! ALMOST! IN MY ARMS...*crying* you...you were hypothermic...your body was in cold shock...the storm...it was so bad...we couldn't take you to the hospital...so we brought you here...you...you died. How could you do this...?_

_Callie - *holding Arizona by her shoulders* heyy heyy I'm here...look I'm okay. You guys saved me...I...I'm sorry..._

Arizona's face was hung low, Callie inched closer and lifted her chin, and she was still not meeting her gaze. Then her eyes darted to a bright red mark on Arizona's collar-bone. It felt like a lightning strike, in a flash mob Callie saw blurry flashes. In an instant her face went stern; she pulled her hands back and took two steps backwards.

_Callie - what did you do?_

_Arizona - what? What do you mean?_

_Callie - *closing her arms* what did you do? To save my life...what the hell did you do?_

_Arizona - *looking down* we...I mean I...there was no way to warm you up...so...I..._

_Callie - you did what?_

_Arizona - I warmed you up! I...I slept with you._

Callie closed her eyes in utter disbelief. Trying to picture any memory she had of last night but she only saw the flashes she has seen before. She looked towards Arizona, who was staring down. A thought crossed her mind.

_Callie - how could you?_

_Arizona - *in disbelief* what? Excuse me! What?_

_Callie - I did not give you any consent..._

_Arizona - *frustrated* Are you even listening to yourself? Did you hear what I said? You were dying..._

_Callie - I. Did. Not. Give. You. Any. Consent. How could you do something like this?_

_Arizona - *hands in air* I saved your life Callie. YOU WERE DYING. That was to SAVE YOUR LIFE!_

_Callie - NO! *closing the distance between them* you wanted. The street creds._

Callie paused for a minute, as she saw Arizona's face going white in realisation. She could see Arizona's eyes darting, trying to frame this situation to the one she's referring.

_Arizona - *taking a step back* don't..._

_Callie - *taking a step forward* the badge of honor..._

_Arizona - *taking couple of steps back* Callie please don't..._

_Callie - *taking more steps forward* the warrior wounds..._

_Arizona - *in desperation* Callieeee pleaseee..._

_Callie - *closing the distance between them & locking her gaze on Arizona* Felt that Arizona? Did you felt that? Having someone's life slipping through your hands? Someone who's your life...someone you love so much that you'll do anything... anything to save their life? Did you felt that? And then what? They hate your guts for saving you? They blame you? How does that feel?_

_Arizona - *looking up in confusion* you hate me? You still hate me? Huh? Of course you do. I was such a fool to even think that things will ever be better between us..._

Callie was about to cut her off but suddenly Arizona's pager went off.

_Arizona - *reading the notifications in horror* CRAP!_

_Callie - What?_

_Arizona - *grabbing her purse & Keys* IT'S ZOLA!_

Before Callie could react, Arizona was already out-of-door, off to the hospital.

* * *

**So ? Is Callie really holding a grudge against Arizona or is she just playing around ?And troubles with Zola ? Where will Meredith & Arizona will stand in this scenario ? Will Callie & Arizona ever confess their love for each other ? Stick tight for next chapter !**

* * *

**- **_The first song used in this chapter is 'Pieces' by 'RED', the second one is 'All Of Me' by 'JOHN LEGEND'. I would definitely suggest you guys to check out these tracks and their other works.  
_

* * *

**- **_Honestly this chapter has taken a lot of my efforts. Callie's mind sequences, the whole consummation thing et al. took a lot of re writing and analysis. I hope you guys like it. I have tried my level best to keep it clean and I am really looking forward to hear about your thoughts on all the elements in this chapter. Good or bad, spare me some words. Thank You !  
_


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